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Becky Kiser on Balancing Family, Faith, and Female Leadership

Are you striving to balance life's demands while still honoring your deepest commitments? In this transformative episode of Seek Go Create, we sit with Becky Kiser, founder of Sacred Holidays and author of "But God Can." Becky shares her personal journey of navigating motherhood, ministry, and self-discovery amid the societal pressures that women face. As we explore the challenges of modern cultural expectations and the power of living a purpose-driven life, join us to uncover how to embrace your true calling with grace and strength. Tune in to gain insights into celebrating life's moments more meaningfully and stepping into your potential without compromise.

"The greatest freedom comes when we admit we can't do it all on our own and lean into God's strength." - Becky Kiser

Access all show and episode resources HERE

About Our Guest:

Becky Kiser is the founder of Sacred Holidays, an organization focused on helping individuals and families celebrate holidays with a deeper focus on Jesus, minimizing chaos and enriching spiritual growth. As an author, life coach, and motivational speaker, she has dedicated her career to empowering women through faith-based initiatives and personal development. Her impactful work includes her book "But God Can," which challenges the self-help culture and encourages reliance on divine strength in overcoming life’s challenges. Becky is also a mother to three daughters and actively engages in redefining traditional roles to inspire women to pursue their divine calling.

Reasons to Listen:

1. Explore the balance between faith and modern challenges as Becky Kiser delves into how spirituality intersects with everyday struggles, empowering women to find their unique paths beyond traditional roles.

2. Gain insights into managing life's pressures from the perspective of cutting through the "hot mess" culture on social media, exploring how authentic living can counteract the demand for perfection online.

3. Discover practical ways to pivot successfully in crisis, learning from Becky's transition during the COVID-19 pandemic from in-person events to hosting an impactful online women's retreat.

Episode Resources & Action Steps:

### Resources Mentioned:

1. **Book: "But God Can"** by Becky Kiser - Available at various online retailers.

2. **Becky Kiser's Website** - Offers free resources and bonus teaching materials related to her book.

3. **Podcast: Hearers and Doers** - Hosted by Becky Kiser, focusing on Christian teachings and empowerment.

### Action Steps:

1. **Purchase and Read "But God Can"** - Consider buying Becky's book not only for personal growth but also as an empowering gift for the significant women in your life. Attach a personal affirmation note if gifting.

2. **Evaluate Priorities and Strivings** - Inspired by the reflections on striving and setting limits on extracurricular activities, assess your own and your family’s engagements. Determine if they align with your values and if any adjustments are necessary to reduce pressure and increase focus on meaningful connections.

3. **Listen and Subscribe to Hearers and Doers Podcast** - To continue gaining insights and spiritual guidance from Becky Kiser, subscribe to her podcast and integrate the teachings into your daily life.

Resources for Leaders from Tim Winders & SGC:

🔹 Unlock Your Potential Today!

  • 🎙 Coaching with Tim: Elevate your leadership and align your work with your faith. Learn More
  • 📚 "Coach: A Story of Success Redefined": A transformative read that will challenge your views on success. Grab Your Copy
  • 📝 Faith Driven Leader Quiz: Discover how well you're aligning faith and work with our quick quiz. Take the Quiz

Key Lessons:

1. **Balance Work and Family**: Becky Kiser shares the importance of balancing professional responsibilities with the personal needs of family, as illustrated by her decision to reschedule an event to care for her daughter. This reinforces the need to prioritize family commitments alongside work obligations.

2. **Female Empowerment and Diverse Roles**: The discussion highlights the concept that women's roles extend beyond traditional expectations of being primarily mothers or wives. Becky speaks on empowering women to find their unique voice and purpose through spirituality and personal empowerment.

3. **The Limitations of Self-Help**: Becky argues that reliance solely on self-help principles can be insufficient when facing significant life challenges. She advocates for a spiritual approach, emphasizing that through faith, individuals can find strength and fulfillment that self-help alone may not provide.

4. **The Impact of Social Media on Self-Image**: The episode touches on the negative effects of social media on personal image and self-esteem, particularly among women. Becky shares insights on the pressures of appearing perfect and the importance of authenticity and vulnerability in online platforms.

5. **Significance of Supporting Women’s Issues**: Becky Kiser insists on the importance of including men in conversations about women's issues, emphasizing that understanding and supporting the challenges women face benefits society as a whole. She encourages men to engage in these discussions to better support the women in their lives.

These key lessons offer valuable insights and encourage deeper reflection and engagement with the topics discussed in the episode.

Episode Highlights:

00:00 Chris challenges gender stereotypes while parenting daughters.

06:29 Focus on women's voices and supporting them.

15:26 Social media preferences and portrayal of life.

17:29 Striving for peace while pursuing busy life.

24:17 Neil Smith became my best friend.

27:46 Drive to prove worth and gain acceptance.

33:07 David's journey to fulfilling his purpose.

40:59 Breaking the cycle of traditional gender roles.

44:45 Navigating Christian celebrations, adapting to life changes.

49:14 Self-help culture lacks depth; gospel provides solace.

59:13 Daughter making new friends, personal growth, entrepreneurship.

01:03:26 Embracing God's guidance through practical coaching.

01:07:45 Check out Hearers and Doers for brief episodes.

Thank you for listening to Seek Go Create!

Our podcast is dedicated to empowering Christian leaders, entrepreneurs, and individuals looking to redefine success in their personal and professional lives. Through in-depth interviews, personal anecdotes, and expert advice, we offer valuable insights and actionable strategies for achieving your goals and living a life of purpose and fulfillment.

If you enjoyed this episode and found it helpful, we encourage you to subscribe to or follow Seek Go Create on your favorite podcast platform, including Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify. By subscribing, you'll never miss an episode and can stay up-to-date on the latest insights and strategies for success.

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Mentioned in this episode:

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Transcript
Becky Kiser:

Things were going unbelievably well and I felt like it

Becky Kiser:

was just time for whatever was next, but I didn't know what that was.

Becky Kiser:

I was like, okay, we're going to shut the door on this ministry and just see.

Becky Kiser:

And I closed everything down in December and, three months

Becky Kiser:

later, COVID took over our world.

Becky Kiser:

And because I had closed things down, I had the capacity to just say to

Becky Kiser:

God, I have this white space now, Lord, how can I help your people?

Becky Kiser:

How can I help you?

Becky Kiser:

Um, uh,

Tim Winders:

How can we turn our everyday lives from ordinary to

Tim Winders:

extraordinary through faith and community today on seek, go create.

Tim Winders:

We're thrilled to have Becky Kaiser, a passionate advocate for empowering

Tim Winders:

women to embrace their faith.

Tim Winders:

and live impactful lives.

Tim Winders:

As the founder of Sacred Holidays and author of the new book, But God Can, How

Tim Winders:

to Stop Striving and Live Purposefully and Abundantly, Becky is dedicated

Tim Winders:

to helping women find confidence in Christ and fall in love with his word.

Tim Winders:

Through her innovative online platforms and speaking engagements around the world,

Tim Winders:

Becky offers not just spiritual guidance, Practical tools to deepen one's faith

Tim Winders:

and chase after dreams and callings.

Tim Winders:

Becky, welcome to seek, go create.

Becky Kiser:

Thank you so much for having me, Tim.

Becky Kiser:

I'm really excited to get to chat with you today.

Tim Winders:

I'm excited about this conversation too, because when I see

Tim Winders:

things like how to stop striving and live purposefully and abundantly,

Tim Winders:

I start salivating a little bit.

Tim Winders:

Hopefully the people on the video don't see that or

Becky Kiser:

it's like perfectly in line for all that you preach

Becky Kiser:

and teach about constantly.

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Tim Winders:

It does it fits so well here, but first question the, I'm used

Tim Winders:

to call it an icebreaker, but it's, it's now become like a kind of a joke.

Tim Winders:

But if somebody asks you what you do, do you tell them?

Becky Kiser:

That's like the big general question.

Becky Kiser:

That's wow, what a big question.

Becky Kiser:

what do I do?

Becky Kiser:

I am an author, which is one of the things that you just shared about.

Becky Kiser:

I'm an author, speaker, women's events, prisons, and

Becky Kiser:

all different kinds of things.

Becky Kiser:

I'm a certified life coach.

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm a serial entrepreneur when it comes to ministry things, I love starting

Becky Kiser:

things and seeing where they go and grow.

Becky Kiser:

And I am married to my husband, Chris.

Becky Kiser:

We've been married for 17 years and have three girls.

Becky Kiser:

So a, what grades are they in now?

Becky Kiser:

Third, fifth and seventh graders.

Becky Kiser:

So we are in that tween and teen girl stage where it's lots of

Becky Kiser:

emotions in our house, ranging from really awesome to really terrible.

Tim Winders:

So that's a great answer.

Tim Winders:

But the first thing that popped in my head here I need to know a little

Tim Winders:

bit more about Chris, who has Four

Becky Kiser:

lot, a lot of

Tim Winders:

women, females in the house and they're in the teenage years.

Tim Winders:

And I'm sure all low maintenance, just easy to get along with low energy.

Tim Winders:

I can tell you're low energy.

Tim Winders:

So tell me just a little bit about Chris before we jump off the

Becky Kiser:

yeah, yeah.

Becky Kiser:

I mean, typically he walks in from work and we're just sitting in a circle,

Becky Kiser:

holding hands, singing songs softly.

Becky Kiser:

Chris, Chris gets patted on the back often in public by strangers

Becky Kiser:

of men just saying, So sorry.

Becky Kiser:

And it's one of the things that I love about him is he'll look

Becky Kiser:

him in the eyes and be like, I'm not, I love having all girls.

Becky Kiser:

And it is definitely different for sure.

Becky Kiser:

And there are times that he embraces the girls, putting face mask on him

Becky Kiser:

and learning all kinds of dance moves.

Becky Kiser:

He'd never do typically, he's become a 50 because he's had to, But yes, the,

Becky Kiser:

the emotions are the parts where it's like, he says there are days I walk

Becky Kiser:

in the house and then just want to slowly back right back to the garage.

Becky Kiser:

Cause someone's either crying or screaming or two different people

Becky Kiser:

are feeling two different extremes.

Becky Kiser:

So yeah, it is, it's an experience.

Becky Kiser:

We got him a boy dog during COVID because we felt like he needed

Becky Kiser:

another male in the household.

Becky Kiser:

So we got him a boy dog.

Tim Winders:

Oh, good.

Tim Winders:

Trying to create some balance in the force or something.

Tim Winders:

But, and the reason it's intriguing for me is our daughter has blessed

Tim Winders:

us with two granddaughters.

Tim Winders:

And so I think about our son in law Hunter, who is a girl dad.

Tim Winders:

And, and so he's experiencing them.

Tim Winders:

They're young, they're four and two, and I'm like going, this is a, this

Tim Winders:

is a dynamic that's challenging.

Tim Winders:

so related to that, We're, we're early on here.

Tim Winders:

I would love for you to answer a question and that is we're, we're

Tim Winders:

going to, we're going to go into, but God can, we're going to talk about

Tim Winders:

how to stop striving and all of that.

Tim Winders:

And I know that your ministry and I get it is primarily focused on women.

Tim Winders:

However.

Tim Winders:

If, if Joe Guy is still listening here at the three minute mark, why should

Tim Winders:

he stick around for this conversation?

Tim Winders:

Why should he hang with us?

Tim Winders:

I know why I'm, that's why I'm having the conversation, but what do you think?

Tim Winders:

Why should he stick around?

Becky Kiser:

love that you're asking that question.

Becky Kiser:

And I would hope that Joe, whoever would continue listening.

Becky Kiser:

sometimes we think girls should teach girls and boys should teach

Becky Kiser:

boys and men can't learn from women.

Becky Kiser:

And that's like a very, especially prevalent.

Becky Kiser:

conversation within the church, right?

Becky Kiser:

That we could do like a whole podcast episode on that alone.

Becky Kiser:

there's no reason one, because everything I'm sharing, while I

Becky Kiser:

write specifically for women, why the cover of my book is hot pink.

Becky Kiser:

All the truths that I share in it are there.

Becky Kiser:

They're not.

Becky Kiser:

central to one gender or another.

Becky Kiser:

Every truth about God is still true for women as it is for men.

Becky Kiser:

Every encouragement and challenge within the book and that I would

Becky Kiser:

share as a woman is relevant for men.

Becky Kiser:

So I'd say number one, you should listen because you should listen

Becky Kiser:

because it's always good to hear and learn from different voices.

Becky Kiser:

The other thing that I would say is that me as someone who focuses

Becky Kiser:

intentionally chooses to focus on women specifically where there's a lot of

Becky Kiser:

women that focus on male and female.

Becky Kiser:

I love to speak in one, like the specific language that women speak.

Becky Kiser:

So every man has females in their lives.

Becky Kiser:

My husband happens to have a lot.

Becky Kiser:

So not every man has as many as my husband, but we have mothers, we

Becky Kiser:

have sisters, we have wives, we have daughters, granddaughters, coworkers.

Becky Kiser:

And so to learn some of those specific bents where that women struggle in,

Becky Kiser:

it's so essential that as, as men.

Becky Kiser:

who are often elevated in, in church culture to be leaders,

Becky Kiser:

know how to best serve, love, and support the women in their lives.

Becky Kiser:

So there, this is, you can listen from two different voices of both be

Becky Kiser:

selfish in this, but then also you get to learn how to love others really

Becky Kiser:

well by listening to this conversation.

Tim Winders:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

And, and I love, I think that's one of the themes or one of the

Tim Winders:

takeaways from your new book.

Tim Winders:

We'll talk more about that in a moment, but, you have an action steps

Tim Winders:

of love God, love self, love others.

Tim Winders:

And to, to me, one of the challenges with our modern cultures, most

Tim Winders:

of us, and I'll point to myself, we're wrapped up in ourselves.

Tim Winders:

And the way we show loving others is to do that.

Tim Winders:

I, I gotta tell you something funny though.

Tim Winders:

You brought up the hot pink.

Tim Winders:

All right.

Tim Winders:

If you're listening on audio, I'm going to paint a picture for you.

Tim Winders:

Tim is sitting here with a white and gray background in the RV, wearing

Tim Winders:

the shirt color that I wear all the time, which is a black t shirt.

Tim Winders:

And that's Tim.

Tim Winders:

Tim, that's people that know me know.

Tim Winders:

Okay.

Tim Winders:

In fact, this morning I mentioned to my wife, Oh no, we've got an emergency.

Tim Winders:

I'm almost out of black t shirts.

Tim Winders:

I do the laundry in the house.

Tim Winders:

So that means that's my cue to do the laundry.

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Tim Winders:

Becky is sitting here with a leopard print.

Tim Winders:

on and I don't think that's lime green, but it's not a muted green shirt And and

Tim Winders:

I I do see in the background some hot pink in two different places And and I

Tim Winders:

want to tell you last night I was I was pulling up your some information and and

Tim Winders:

and going through some things with your book and Having a lot of fun with it.

Tim Winders:

And when I pulled up the one pager for those that don't know one

Tim Winders:

pager is just Information that we get on people that are guests.

Tim Winders:

I opened it up You My wife was sitting across from me doing something else

Tim Winders:

on her laptop and I went, ah, I literally almost yelled out loud

Tim Winders:

and I turned my laptop around.

Tim Winders:

I said, look at all of this color on this one sheet because mine is

Tim Winders:

muted gray and black and white.

Tim Winders:

need to celebrate our differences, right?

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Becky Kiser:

And Tim, let me just say, you are, you're not the first interview that

Becky Kiser:

I've done with a male on the, as I've been like working on book tour stuff.

Becky Kiser:

And it has so impressed me that you're willing to have, especially

Becky Kiser:

even knowing that you're a male who is muted gray tones.

Becky Kiser:

And my, which my husband appreciates.

Becky Kiser:

He's black and white is the way he lives, both in how he processes

Becky Kiser:

and what his preferences are.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm like every shade in between the whole rainbow.

Becky Kiser:

I love that you're willing to say we all have something to learn.

Becky Kiser:

And, it made me excited when I was like, another guy is signing up for this.

Becky Kiser:

I think this is amazing.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm sure it,

Becky Kiser:

was also shocking and you maybe needed to put sunglasses on and that's fine.

Tim Winders:

I, yeah, there was a lot of color on that one page or more color

Tim Winders:

than I may have seen in the last few.

Tim Winders:

Now, the, the cool thing about it, and I think this just goes to the,

Tim Winders:

the value of learning and listening.

Tim Winders:

When my wife and I got married, we're 35 years in now.

Tim Winders:

So this has been a long time, but I still remember it.

Tim Winders:

This is why it's important.

Tim Winders:

Our first house, I said, off white eggshell walls, that's best

Tim Winders:

for resale, blah, blah, blah.

Tim Winders:

And she was kind of sort of, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tim Winders:

I mean, it was early on, next house, just a few years later,

Tim Winders:

she goes this wall right here, two story wall, right behind the sofa.

Tim Winders:

That is an accent wall.

Tim Winders:

We are going to paint that.

Tim Winders:

And at first, when the color started going on, I thought it was fire engine red.

Tim Winders:

As it dried, this was the nineties.

Tim Winders:

So it was popular then it became more of a deeper Burgundy, but I,

Tim Winders:

Becky, I hated it when I first saw

Becky Kiser:

I

Tim Winders:

but you know what, though, over time, I begin to go, I

Tim Winders:

understand why we need an accent wall.

Tim Winders:

And I've told her, I appreciate you bringing color in, into my life.

Tim Winders:

Now

Becky Kiser:

I love it.

Tim Winders:

that's a little bit of a light touch.

Tim Winders:

to my bigger question.

Tim Winders:

That's going to be a deep into the pool type question here.

Becky Kiser:

Okay.

Tim Winders:

What is it about culture that creates so much pressure on

Tim Winders:

us to not accept the accent walls?

Tim Winders:

That people want to throw at us.

Tim Winders:

And I could tell you, I did not have that written down.

Tim Winders:

So we'll, we'll assume the Holy spirit's working here with the,

Tim Winders:

with the accent walls and the color.

Tim Winders:

Why is it?

Tim Winders:

Because I also think that that leads to the pressure that we're going to talk

Tim Winders:

about that culture puts on women and men.

Tim Winders:

I mentioned earlier, we've got, we've got a really cool couple of episodes

Tim Winders:

here that look at the dichotomies, but, what's going on with all the pressure

Tim Winders:

that's coming down on specifically.

Tim Winders:

Women today.

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Becky Kiser:

I, I would say that first the pressure, at least in how I interpret

Becky Kiser:

your question with the accent wall, I think there's a lot of pressure.

Becky Kiser:

Christian culture and world culture are a little bit different when

Becky Kiser:

it comes to us as women, And men.

Becky Kiser:

But there's a lot of pressure within the church for us as women

Becky Kiser:

to be certain things, right?

Becky Kiser:

To be quiet and submissive, to, be wives and mothers, to want to serve and host and

Becky Kiser:

cook and wear aprons and all the things.

Becky Kiser:

And for men, I would say on the reverse, there's this expectation

Becky Kiser:

that you're strong and a leader and boisterous and brave.

Becky Kiser:

All these other things.

Becky Kiser:

So I'm sure you get to the man's side in, in the other

Becky Kiser:

conversation you had referenced.

Becky Kiser:

So I would say for women, the accent while pressure for us is

Becky Kiser:

that we, we feel this pressure to be a certain way within the culture.

Becky Kiser:

And then in the world, we're told now women have power, so go in.

Becky Kiser:

You, you do you boo is what like people are saying, and you can

Becky Kiser:

do absolutely everything and you could be anything you want.

Becky Kiser:

You want to be president, go for it.

Becky Kiser:

You want to change the world, you can do that.

Becky Kiser:

And all this pressure for women.

Becky Kiser:

We have these two very large voices sitting on our shoulders of you

Becky Kiser:

can be anything and do anything.

Becky Kiser:

Which isn't possible.

Becky Kiser:

And also you need to only be this and only look like this,

Becky Kiser:

which is impossible either.

Becky Kiser:

And so that leads to this like turmoil that we all experienced,

Becky Kiser:

which leads to facades going up of who actually am I, what am I here to do?

Becky Kiser:

I have this drive to do this, but church says to do this, or I have this desire to

Becky Kiser:

be this, but the world says that's wrong.

Becky Kiser:

So for women specifically, that's the pressure we're constantly feeling is I

Becky Kiser:

don't know where I belong in any desire that wells up within me feels wrong and

Becky Kiser:

out of place somewhere and not accepted.

Tim Winders:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

And I think one of the things that's tough, this, and this is both men and

Tim Winders:

women is the, I don't even know if the comparison even fits in to it.

Tim Winders:

I mean, I, I jumped over last night and looked at your Instagram and Instagram is

Tim Winders:

like one of the best places in the world.

Tim Winders:

And one of the worst places in the world to go.

Tim Winders:

And yeah, and, and, and listen, we, we, I guess try to be authentic and some

Tim Winders:

people maybe are a little too authentic and, but it seems to me that that is a

Tim Winders:

little bit more of a challenge for women.

Tim Winders:

I don't know, is that even a fair statement to make the whole

Becky Kiser:

100 percent of your statement.

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Becky Kiser:

And maybe in the same way, like not too many men are super active

Becky Kiser:

on Instagram, but I would say at least for my husband, like LinkedIn

Becky Kiser:

is a more popular place to go.

Becky Kiser:

And so you can see how many connections do they have?

Becky Kiser:

How many job offers have they gotten that week?

Becky Kiser:

How many people have affirmed them in something?

Becky Kiser:

Are you posting this and getting this many views on it?

Becky Kiser:

How, what are your job listings?

Becky Kiser:

and in the same way for women, we go to Instagram or Facebook and, and

Becky Kiser:

then for younger girls, it's just, there's like 25, 000 places they're on.

Becky Kiser:

And, and it's visual.

Becky Kiser:

So you see like for men, it's more factual, right?

Becky Kiser:

there's not too much you can fabricate on LinkedIn now.

Becky Kiser:

You can still pose for sure.

Becky Kiser:

and there's a lot of people who do fabricate it, but for Instagram,

Becky Kiser:

you can post a actually filtered picture of yourself smiling.

Becky Kiser:

But behind the scenes, your marriage is struggling.

Becky Kiser:

Your house is a wreck.

Becky Kiser:

Your kids are just on media all day long.

Becky Kiser:

But then what I would see as a woman is she's got it all together and I don't.

Becky Kiser:

And so it is this, the comparison for sure is something that makes

Becky Kiser:

us, it's another thing on us that makes us feel like I'm not enough.

Becky Kiser:

I don't have it together.

Becky Kiser:

I'll never be as good as her.

Becky Kiser:

I'll never.

Becky Kiser:

Regardless of what field you're in, I'm an author speaker, but lawyers,

Becky Kiser:

doctors, teachers, all that, you're seeing other people be more successful

Becky Kiser:

than you, but you're really just seeing a slice of their life.

Becky Kiser:

And it may or may not even be real.

Becky Kiser:

Which is tricky.

Tim Winders:

It is.

Tim Winders:

And our, our daughter, she shared with us that she's removed Instagram from

Tim Winders:

her phone and she brought it back on.

Tim Winders:

She said for all of two hours and then said, you know what?

Tim Winders:

Not good.

Tim Winders:

All right, Becky, here's a, this is probably going to be a tough question

Becky Kiser:

Okay.

Tim Winders:

because I, I wrestle with this myself and I'm going to, I'm going to

Tim Winders:

lead up to it so you could your palms can get a little bit sweaty thinking about it.

Tim Winders:

Part of the challenge with that.

Tim Winders:

Is people that come on to these platforms and we're doing podcasts,

Tim Winders:

we're writing books, we're, doing studies and all of that kind of stuff.

Tim Winders:

And so I want to present the irony that one of the things I do when I work

Tim Winders:

with executives and leaders is I try to tell them to be more peaceful at rest,

Tim Winders:

create more white space in their lives.

Tim Winders:

yet when they look at me.

Tim Winders:

They don't, you don't see the full picture, but they go, you're writing

Tim Winders:

books, you're doing podcasts, you got YouTube and all that.

Tim Winders:

I could see that women could look at you and possibly be intimidated.

Tim Winders:

I mean, you got a lot of stuff going on.

Tim Winders:

Awesome stuff.

Tim Winders:

Awesome stuff.

Tim Winders:

So I told you, it's a tough question.

Tim Winders:

How would you respond if someone says, but Becky, I can't be like you look

Tim Winders:

at all this stuff you've got going on.

Tim Winders:

And I hate to throw the word imperfection, but just.

Tim Winders:

All right, how about that?

Tim Winders:

Was that a that's a tough question, isn't it?

Becky Kiser:

It's a fair question.

Becky Kiser:

And it's one that I'm sure people go to my page and sense, and they're for

Becky Kiser:

sure pages I go to and have the exact same feeling I would say it's one of

Becky Kiser:

the reasons I try as often as I can to.

Becky Kiser:

disarm people by sharing the imperfections of my life.

Becky Kiser:

It's one of the reasons I try to do lives or podcast interviews without

Becky Kiser:

makeup on with a hat on instead of my hair fix, because that's

Becky Kiser:

real and I don't look glamorous.

Becky Kiser:

Like my headshot would look every day.

Becky Kiser:

Most of the time I'm in athletic clothes.

Becky Kiser:

And Yeah, if somebody were to say that to me, I would say back to

Becky Kiser:

them, you're absolutely right.

Becky Kiser:

And the truth is it's a, it's both a maturity response

Becky Kiser:

when we go onto social media.

Becky Kiser:

And this is something I say to my kids, my kids, friends, my

Becky Kiser:

friends, myself is we all show.

Becky Kiser:

the public persona on our socials, right?

Becky Kiser:

And that's myself included.

Becky Kiser:

Even though I try to be as intentional as I can to show as

Becky Kiser:

much unfiltered parts, social media, isn't where I'm going to go first.

Becky Kiser:

If a doctor gives me a diagnosis, right?

Becky Kiser:

I'm going to process that privately.

Becky Kiser:

I'm going to process that with my community.

Becky Kiser:

When Chris and I are struggling in our marriage, I'm That's not

Becky Kiser:

where I'm going to post because it's not people's business.

Becky Kiser:

And, and so that's where it's we have to have the maturity to say, I'm seeing

Becky Kiser:

one portion of everybody's life because now there are people that you referenced

Becky Kiser:

it to the overshare on social media, and that's a different conversation.

Becky Kiser:

And those people just, they, they need help.

Becky Kiser:

But for the rest of us, I think a mature response is share, share as

Becky Kiser:

vulnerably and authentically as you can.

Becky Kiser:

But there are things that just belong in a living room and belong around a

Becky Kiser:

table and don't belong on social media.

Becky Kiser:

So I can reference on social and my email list.

Becky Kiser:

I can reference to them, Hey, Chris and I've had a really hard year and

Becky Kiser:

here's what we're doing to help, but I'm not posting every day, man, we

Becky Kiser:

had another fight again, or whatever.

Becky Kiser:

Because it's not social media's business.

Becky Kiser:

That's not better for my marriage.

Becky Kiser:

What's better for my marriage is we're working through counseling

Becky Kiser:

and we're fighting for each other and now we're in a good season.

Becky Kiser:

but that, does that make sense to answer your question of

Tim Winders:

it does.

Tim Winders:

And, and I want to affirm that I went and listened to Hearers

Tim Winders:

and Doers, your podcast.

Tim Winders:

I went and listened to a few episodes.

Tim Winders:

The first one I listened to, and maybe this gives you a little bit about me,

Tim Winders:

I'm looking for more of your story.

Tim Winders:

I want to find out more about that.

Tim Winders:

Becky, if I'm about to have a one hour conversation and the first one I went

Tim Winders:

to, and I'm also looking at, how we do in podcasts, we say, okay, there's a

Tim Winders:

episode released every week and then something happened and then what's, and

Tim Winders:

I went to the one where you had just.

Tim Winders:

Had tonsils out.

Tim Winders:

Does that right?

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

and you basically with a little bit of a raspy voice

Tim Winders:

too, by the way, said, we're going to take a break and we're not

Tim Winders:

going to do anything for a while.

Tim Winders:

And to me, that is the opposite of someone who's attempting to power through and

Tim Winders:

do it just for the likes and dislikes.

Tim Winders:

And so I see that.

Tim Winders:

but it, but it still does occur with people that they look at our best.

Tim Winders:

And truthfully, I, I'm getting to where I really loathe the hashtag hot mess.

Tim Winders:

Oh, I'm a hot mess.

Tim Winders:

Because what happens is those, this is what I've observed with people.

Tim Winders:

We have this Pavlovian response where it's like, Oh my gosh, I got more likes on the

Tim Winders:

hot mess post than I did on the, whatever post I need to do more hot mess posts.

Tim Winders:

And then it becomes their life.

Tim Winders:

Anyway, we don't, let's, let's don't go down that road.

Tim Winders:

Tell me a little bit.

Tim Winders:

I'm, I'm always interested, not in likes, Full spiritual story, but,

Tim Winders:

were you, did you come out of the womb being a Jesus follower or was there a

Tim Winders:

little bit of a journey along the way?

Tim Winders:

What do you want to share about that?

Becky Kiser:

Great question.

Becky Kiser:

Definitely did not come out of the womb being a Jesus follower.

Becky Kiser:

That is for sure.

Becky Kiser:

My parents

Tim Winders:

And that, and that's bad, that's bad theology, by the way.

Tim Winders:

I just want to mention to everyone that's bad

Becky Kiser:

Yes, we, we can, we all hear the laughter hopefully and know

Becky Kiser:

that that's not possible for anyone.

Becky Kiser:

but it was for sure not possible for me.

Becky Kiser:

My parents divorced when I was an infant and they had joint custody,

Becky Kiser:

like as joint as they come Monday, Tuesday, mom, Wednesday, Thursday,

Becky Kiser:

dad, first, third weekend mom.

Becky Kiser:

So that was my, I had a very split upbringing.

Becky Kiser:

My mom is, I don't know, she wouldn't consider herself an atheist.

Becky Kiser:

She believes in mother earth.

Becky Kiser:

So she is a spiritual person, but, so like creation is her God.

Becky Kiser:

And when it's a full moon, we would have to go on the back

Becky Kiser:

porch and howl at the moon.

Becky Kiser:

And so just a very.

Becky Kiser:

Different upbringing that wouldn't be at all Jesus centered in her house.

Becky Kiser:

And then when we were with my dad and stepmom at his house on those weekends.

Becky Kiser:

We grew up Methodist, which is a little bit more liturgical of a denomination.

Becky Kiser:

so very involved at church at my dad's house, but it was, more reserved

Becky Kiser:

around church events than maybe a personal relationship with Jesus.

Becky Kiser:

And, that all changed in high school.

Becky Kiser:

I have a brother who's two years older than me.

Becky Kiser:

His name's Neil Smith, and he's always been my best friend.

Becky Kiser:

And he became a Christian because a youth intern reached out to him, so

Becky Kiser:

that We had been going through a ton of stuff in our family and reached

Becky Kiser:

out and shared the gospel with him.

Becky Kiser:

And my brother became a Christian and for this, this was just before his

Becky Kiser:

senior year, and he was like, I can't leave Becky and not knowing what's true.

Becky Kiser:

And to him for a year, he was Jesus to me.

Becky Kiser:

He loved me when I did.

Becky Kiser:

The most horrible life choices, not things to him and didn't judge me as I had felt

Becky Kiser:

judged by so many Christians around me.

Becky Kiser:

And so I became a Christian at 16.

Becky Kiser:

That's when things really changed for me.

Becky Kiser:

and it was all new because I was not raised in a Christian home.

Becky Kiser:

I didn't know any of those things.

Becky Kiser:

And, and that's where my relationship with God really took off.

Becky Kiser:

And it felt very much like a saddle Paul moment for me of, I felt saved

Becky Kiser:

by God, I felt rescued by God.

Becky Kiser:

And I was just blown away by him and his word, completely captivated by

Becky Kiser:

his word and the truth within it.

Becky Kiser:

And I ended up going to Texas A& M University for college.

Becky Kiser:

And there's such a strong Christian community base there.

Becky Kiser:

At least there was when I was there.

Becky Kiser:

And, It was a strong time of discipleship.

Becky Kiser:

And that's when I knew really felt confirmed that God wanted to

Becky Kiser:

use me in some capacity ministry.

Becky Kiser:

I just didn't know what that looked like.

Becky Kiser:

and so it was just like a rollercoaster of ups and downs.

Becky Kiser:

I ended up going into public relations and adapt and leaving

Becky Kiser:

that to go work at a church.

Becky Kiser:

And that led to more teaching and writing.

Becky Kiser:

And here I am today.

Becky Kiser:

So the journey of following God was not something that was innate at birth.

Becky Kiser:

It was a journey of trusting him and him being my safest place.

Tim Winders:

And I saw somewhere that not too long before that 16

Tim Winders:

year old, where you, where you met Jesus, that you, you had a little

Tim Winders:

prison situation, a rap sheet here.

Tim Winders:

So let's, let's get both sides of the story.

Tim Winders:

So you gotta, you gotta tell just a brief,

Becky Kiser:

I mean, I did say that I

Becky Kiser:

didn't leave a very

Tim Winders:

you're, so you're tough.

Tim Winders:

It's tough, Becky.

Tim Winders:

It's like prison, Becky.

Tim Winders:

Yeah.

Becky Kiser:

I may have a hopping book, but I've been incarcerated.

Becky Kiser:

not, I, Yes, my brother and I, we've always been close in, in our pre Jesus

Becky Kiser:

days, we, teamed up in shoplifting and eventually got busted for that.

Becky Kiser:

And so that was a good wake up moment for both of us in many ways,

Becky Kiser:

not a spiritual wake up, but a.

Becky Kiser:

Stop hiding and covering in these areas.

Becky Kiser:

And, yeah, so that's, it's everybody.

Becky Kiser:

My brother does a lot of ministry work too.

Becky Kiser:

So it's everybody's favorite fun fact of, did you know Nils and

Becky Kiser:

Becky had been arrested before?

Becky Kiser:

yeah,

Tim Winders:

So what I hear when I hear that is I hear entrepreneur.

Becky Kiser:

yeah.

Becky Kiser:

We've always started things together and now they're legal

Becky Kiser:

things, which is progress, right?

Becky Kiser:

Progress.

Tim Winders:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

So that's good.

Tim Winders:

so it, it sounds as if you've always had an, I hate to mention something

Tim Winders:

that your mother may have said, but an energy to excel and succeed and

Tim Winders:

to, that when you stepped into things, you would move into a leadership.

Tim Winders:

Type position, or at least a, or you're going to lead and do things.

Tim Winders:

Is that, is that correct assessment?

Becky Kiser:

Totally fair.

Becky Kiser:

Totally fair to say.

Tim Winders:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

And is that been a drive that you've had all along?

Tim Winders:

Or is it something I'll ask it this way.

Tim Winders:

Is it something that you're trying to prove or I'll use a word that's in your

Tim Winders:

new book, strive for to gain acceptance because I, and I'll bring this up

Tim Winders:

and then I'll let you respond to it.

Tim Winders:

My wife.

Tim Winders:

Came from what we would call a broken home her parents And she has identified

Tim Winders:

That she has a performance mindset that is related to And and I don't

Tim Winders:

think this is just a female thing, but

Becky Kiser:

Mm hmm.

Tim Winders:

She believes if she achieves and accomplishes enough Then the people

Tim Winders:

around her and even god at times will be happy and things will be okay so You

Becky Kiser:

I would say for me, that's not the case.

Becky Kiser:

My husband actually is very much that way.

Becky Kiser:

for me, I, I think maybe it's more of a like hard knock life.

Becky Kiser:

You, you just have to do it right.

Becky Kiser:

Like you make it happen.

Becky Kiser:

and No.

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Becky Kiser:

What actually feels very, I don't know if aversive is the right word, but the

Becky Kiser:

achievement in the process of having things more public as opposed to a

Becky Kiser:

prep, like private ministry or just serving the people within my community,

Becky Kiser:

the aversion I have is I don't want it to be construed as achieving.

Becky Kiser:

Which is I think a difference for men and women and many capacities of

Becky Kiser:

there is this, I don't want to come across like I'm trying to be something

Becky Kiser:

and that it's not the bent for it.

Becky Kiser:

For me, it's, I really want to see women freed.

Becky Kiser:

And right now I see so many women shackled.

Becky Kiser:

And so do I want to have books that are bestsellers?

Becky Kiser:

Do I want to be able to reach Thousands of millions of people on podcast and social.

Becky Kiser:

for sure I do, because each number represents a life that could be changed,

Becky Kiser:

but I wouldn't say that the achievement, I have other events for sure, but I

Becky Kiser:

wouldn't say the achievement is a personal goal for me other than the fact that it

Becky Kiser:

means we made a significant impact here.

Tim Winders:

And one of the words that's in your book

Tim Winders:

title is this word purposeful.

Tim Winders:

And I, I think it's a word that it's really become integrated

Tim Winders:

into our modern culture.

Tim Winders:

And I actually think it's causing a lot of good.

Tim Winders:

And a lot of challenges because a lot of people are, I need to find my purpose.

Tim Winders:

I need to find my purpose.

Tim Winders:

Whereas I'm, I'm of the age.

Tim Winders:

I remember talking to my grandfather and if I were to ask him what his

Tim Winders:

purpose in life was, he would look at me like, what are you talking about?

Tim Winders:

I get up every day.

Tim Winders:

I go to work, I come home, I make enough money to, put

Tim Winders:

biscuits and gravy on the table.

Tim Winders:

And it is a little bit of our modern day reality.

Tim Winders:

But the, the, the question I've got related to this, and this is probably

Tim Winders:

a deeper question that could, I don't think we're going to go into a tailspin,

Tim Winders:

but I think you brought it up earlier.

Tim Winders:

You said there's the way the world looks at things and in their church world,

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

what is the church world doing to cause this

Tim Winders:

issue that we're talking about?

Tim Winders:

And let me just throw a few things out and then you could

Tim Winders:

just pick whatever you want.

Tim Winders:

We've got the whole, I won't even go into this because I'm not agreeing

Tim Winders:

with, the world's coming to an end and, and we need to do everything we can.

Tim Winders:

Don't get me started on in time stuff.

Tim Winders:

Please don't get me started.

Tim Winders:

So please don't go down that road.

Tim Winders:

and then we've also got this, you need to make an impact.

Tim Winders:

You've been saved and you need to make an impact.

Tim Winders:

And then we've also got this, but you're a woman, you, you've got a role within

Tim Winders:

what we call the Orthodox or traditional church and you, you can do certain

Tim Winders:

things, but you can't do certain things.

Tim Winders:

And so have I, have I given you enough hot buttons where you

Tim Winders:

could take this and run with it?

Becky Kiser:

sure.

Becky Kiser:

The, the whole purpose, I would say this is likely for men and women that

Becky Kiser:

our culture and you're right, where like the generations before us wouldn't

Becky Kiser:

have felt the same pressure of purpose because you just did your thing, right?

Becky Kiser:

You weren't as concerned and I would think media has done a lot

Becky Kiser:

to expose us to those things.

Becky Kiser:

And so that's where there's this unattainable, the great purpose, right?

Becky Kiser:

That that we're never going to fully reach.

Becky Kiser:

And I do talk about it in the book that.

Becky Kiser:

It's not like the destination, Oh, now I know my purpose and now I've

Becky Kiser:

reached my purpose and that's it.

Becky Kiser:

You've won the game of life.

Becky Kiser:

It's not, it's not like that.

Becky Kiser:

Purpose is your purpose is ever evolving.

Becky Kiser:

It's shifting, it's changing.

Becky Kiser:

It's the purpose is the journey with God.

Becky Kiser:

And Like you, and we see that all throughout scripture, David,

Becky Kiser:

I'm actually reading through the life of David right now.

Becky Kiser:

And David was told when he was very young, your purpose is you're going to, you're

Becky Kiser:

anointed to be the next king of Israel.

Becky Kiser:

But he still then was a small little warrior who then had

Becky Kiser:

the courage to fight Goliath.

Becky Kiser:

But then it was decades of him hiding and fighting and hiding and

Becky Kiser:

fighting and hiding and fighting.

Becky Kiser:

And if you were to look at his.

Becky Kiser:

Life journey, it would be, you would say he hadn't lived his purpose because

Becky Kiser:

his purpose was to be king, a man after God's own heart, but the, he

Becky Kiser:

showed himself as a man after God's own heart through the hiding and the

Becky Kiser:

fighting and the hiding and the fighting before he ever lived in a palace.

Becky Kiser:

so that would be my, my response to the whole greater purpose.

Becky Kiser:

For women specifically when it comes to our place in the church, it, it's

Becky Kiser:

complicated because of the pressure that's put within us to be a certain way.

Becky Kiser:

And I would say the greatest purpose the church tells us as women is

Becky Kiser:

your greatest purpose is that as mom and wife and you have no greater

Becky Kiser:

calling than out of your family.

Becky Kiser:

And Tim, this is where maybe we would, we'll get into debate, we'll see

Becky Kiser:

where we, where we both land on this.

Becky Kiser:

and for sure where people.

Becky Kiser:

Listening may, may have more questions or, discussion items and DMS and comments.

Becky Kiser:

But I just don't see that in scripture anywhere.

Becky Kiser:

I don't see that scripture says, woman, your greatest calling and purpose

Becky Kiser:

in life is to be a wife and a mom.

Becky Kiser:

Because what about all those people who aren't married?

Becky Kiser:

What about all those people who can't have children or don't have children?

Becky Kiser:

Our greatest, my greatest purpose.

Becky Kiser:

I have three girls who I love with everything.

Becky Kiser:

Like I would literally kill for them.

Becky Kiser:

Probably not.

Becky Kiser:

Maybe we don't post that part, but like I, I would give anything for them.

Becky Kiser:

And same for Chris.

Becky Kiser:

However, they are not my greatest calling.

Becky Kiser:

And it's very important for me that they see that they're not, they are

Becky Kiser:

so intrinsically important to me, but they are not my greatest calling.

Becky Kiser:

My greatest calling is to God.

Becky Kiser:

And so when I have that purpose, my purpose is to love God,

Becky Kiser:

to know God, to follow God.

Becky Kiser:

That means that I can say, you know what girls, this is a really

Becky Kiser:

busy season for me right now.

Becky Kiser:

So for the next couple of weeks, I can't be there to tuck you in at night.

Becky Kiser:

Or my oldest, I was selected to go chaperone her field trip, but it's

Becky Kiser:

the same day my boat comes out.

Becky Kiser:

And I can say, I know I've never missed a field trip, but this year I have to,

Becky Kiser:

because sometimes my greatest purpose of that day isn't to be their mom.

Becky Kiser:

It's I have women that I need to speak to.

Becky Kiser:

does that answer your question a little bit when it comes to purpose?

Becky Kiser:

Are we

Becky Kiser:

still friends, Tim?

Tim Winders:

It no, no, it does.

Tim Winders:

I'm going to twist it a little bit here because we've got a few minutes.

Tim Winders:

I'm going to twist.

Tim Winders:

I am coming to believe that we have taken the family values roles in the house.

Tim Winders:

People can do this.

Tim Winders:

People can't do this way out of context from the, what we'll call first

Tim Winders:

century Authors that wrote, in the, in the period that they were writing

Tim Winders:

and we've attempted to adopt them.

Tim Winders:

I actually will tell somebody, listen, be careful going down the

Tim Winders:

biblical family values route because you brought up David earlier.

Tim Winders:

I don't think anyone wants to really use the model of David for family values.

Tim Winders:

And, and things like that.

Tim Winders:

I don't want to get off on that, but

Becky Kiser:

Right.

Tim Winders:

so I, I do want to, I do want to point blank, ask this question.

Tim Winders:

Is it okay for women to be in ministry roles?

Becky Kiser:

To be in ministry roles within the church?

Becky Kiser:

yeah.

Becky Kiser:

They were always in ministry roles.

Becky Kiser:

Now, certain denominations would say it's not okay, and certain people holding

Becky Kiser:

certain theological stances would say, no, women are to shut their mouth.

Becky Kiser:

Women aren't to teach men.

Becky Kiser:

But when we look at the full story of God, when we look at how Jesus consistently

Becky Kiser:

elevated women throughout scripture, when we look at their roles and positions all

Becky Kiser:

throughout, since the beginning of time, now the only limitations I see of women

Becky Kiser:

in scripture were those of the culture.

Becky Kiser:

And so when we look at the culture of scripture and see, Oh, maybe

Becky Kiser:

women just couldn't do that because.

Becky Kiser:

They weren't right.

Becky Kiser:

so you referenced David.

Becky Kiser:

David was allowed to have thousands of wives.

Becky Kiser:

We would say today, that's probably not okay.

Becky Kiser:

But culturally, this is one element we can't understand about

Becky Kiser:

David, but culturally there, he wasn't breaking a law of God.

Becky Kiser:

It's just weird.

Becky Kiser:

I would say the same for women, not having prominence and position.

Becky Kiser:

I mean, women in America have just been able to vote for a hundred years.

Becky Kiser:

So when we talk about women not having place in position, I think a lot of

Becky Kiser:

that's rooted in, it wasn't until 30 years ago that women really even started

Becky Kiser:

to be in leadership in the world, people who don't even hold Christian values.

Becky Kiser:

And so I would say we're coming along, but we're coming along way too slow

Becky Kiser:

when it comes to what women can do.

Becky Kiser:

And we're handicapped by verses that have been interpreted by some men,

Becky Kiser:

not all men, And then preach from the stage because that's all that's been

Becky Kiser:

allowed to communicate the truth.

Tim Winders:

And you brought up something earlier, you mentioned your daughters

Tim Winders:

and you mentioned missing a field trip.

Tim Winders:

And truthfully, listen, there'll be other field trips,

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

but.

Tim Winders:

I'll mention this and you can respond to it if you'd like part of training

Tim Winders:

up our children, which is scriptural.

Tim Winders:

We are to train them up is, is not to be with them all the time.

Tim Winders:

I mean, in my opinion, this is my parenting style.

Tim Winders:

My wife would.

Tim Winders:

Maybe say some things similar, but part of our role, I think the biggest part of

Tim Winders:

that role is pointing them up and pointing them to the relationship with the father.

Tim Winders:

And I think one of the things that we do is provide an

Tim Winders:

example of what it looks like.

Tim Winders:

And truthfully, You being a successful, woman and the, the mother of three

Tim Winders:

daughters isn't showing them the path of what they can do more powerful than

Tim Winders:

saying, okay, and listen, there's, I think people need to go where they're called.

Tim Winders:

I think people need to go where their assignment is.

Tim Winders:

And, and, listen, there's probably times where you would say, I

Tim Winders:

think we even rescheduled once.

Tim Winders:

I don't know if what was going on, but it's like, It's Hey, listen, one

Tim Winders:

of my daughters needs something, Tim, we're going to talk on another day.

Tim Winders:

And that's cool.

Tim Winders:

I don't know if that was the case or not, but anyway, you want to say

Tim Winders:

anything about that as, and that is the model that one provides for

Tim Winders:

their children and their family.

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Becky Kiser:

That's yes.

Becky Kiser:

And we did reschedule my, my oldest daughter had to get, braces on her

Becky Kiser:

bottom teeth and I knew she would be in so much pain and would need me.

Becky Kiser:

And so I reached out to you and your team to see, is there any

Becky Kiser:

way that we can move this around?

Becky Kiser:

So that's an example of, yes, it, it goes both ways on the compromise for

Becky Kiser:

between mom and worker and all of that.

Becky Kiser:

But what I always say for my daughters is, and it's unique

Becky Kiser:

because I'm raising girls, right?

Becky Kiser:

So this context of how women are positioned within church culture,

Becky Kiser:

Christian culture, I see it not just for myself, but I see what do I want

Becky Kiser:

to be important for my children in And I've said that so many times to

Becky Kiser:

friends of I just don't want to raise girls who just raise kids, who just

Becky Kiser:

raise kids, who just raise kids.

Becky Kiser:

Because what, what is that cycle teaches nothing.

Becky Kiser:

And it is actually very similar to the culture of Bible times.

Becky Kiser:

So I can get why it's been taught in the church, because that was women

Becky Kiser:

only, like their job was to go collect water, to make meals, to entertain

Becky Kiser:

the guests and to raise the children.

Becky Kiser:

So it's actually very biblical roles for women, but our culture

Becky Kiser:

has changed significantly.

Becky Kiser:

And me, how can I show my girls, okay, how do we listen

Becky Kiser:

to the voice of God within us?

Becky Kiser:

How do we take leaps of faith towards the Holy Spirit to see

Becky Kiser:

what he might be leading us to do?

Becky Kiser:

How do we make mistakes?

Becky Kiser:

How do we try things?

Becky Kiser:

How do we fail at things?

Becky Kiser:

And in that you can still make sure your kids feel really seen and loved.

Becky Kiser:

And in that you can still have.

Becky Kiser:

And marriage that stands the test of time and has a really good seasons and you

Becky Kiser:

fight through the really hard seasons.

Becky Kiser:

You can still be involved in and serve your church community.

Becky Kiser:

You can still have really great friends who show up for you when you need it

Becky Kiser:

and you show up for when they need it.

Becky Kiser:

so that the whole.

Becky Kiser:

The holistic approach is so much better and so much richer than just

Becky Kiser:

saying, all right, you're going to be great little mamas one day.

Becky Kiser:

And that's not a bad thing to say, but it's a bad thing to

Becky Kiser:

say when it's the only thing.

Tim Winders:

And I think it speaks so much to a word that I really

Tim Winders:

loathe, and that is tradition.

Tim Winders:

And listen, let's don't, let's, Don't make light of the fact that I'm a guy

Tim Winders:

that has basically been homeless for now going on 12, 12 years, my wife

Tim Winders:

and I've been traveling the world, went to Bible school for a minute

Tim Winders:

or two, and then jumped in an RV.

Tim Winders:

And so we're now over our five year anniversary of we don't have a home.

Tim Winders:

We don't have stuff.

Tim Winders:

We don't adhere to that.

Tim Winders:

So I, I love the thought of that.

Tim Winders:

And it goes back to, I believe, It's huge that people need to be seeking

Tim Winders:

the kingdom of God and they need to find their assignment in God's kingdom.

Tim Winders:

And so the, the path that you're moving along is cool.

Tim Winders:

There is, there's a book and a group that I think you started a few years

Tim Winders:

back called is it sacred holidays?

Tim Winders:

Did I get that right?

Tim Winders:

All right.

Tim Winders:

All right.

Tim Winders:

The reason I love this topic, and I want to get to talking about your new

Tim Winders:

book here as we wrap up, but the reason I love this topic is that I think that

Tim Winders:

our culture, society, church world, all of that has really messed up.

Tim Winders:

And I'll even say it idolized holidays, dates, Birthdays, my

Tim Winders:

wife's birthday is coming up.

Tim Winders:

I might have something thrown to me from the back of the RV here,

Tim Winders:

but we just making them, made them a bigger deal than possible.

Tim Winders:

I don't, that's what you talk about there, but talk a little bit about

Tim Winders:

what you did with sacred holidays.

Tim Winders:

And then we're going to move into talking about, but God can.

Becky Kiser:

Yes.

Becky Kiser:

So I know eight or so years ago, I saw I had younger kids then.

Becky Kiser:

And I just saw that there was so just like what you said, holidays

Becky Kiser:

are made into this huge thing, but they are also so commercialized now.

Becky Kiser:

And I just, I didn't want to raise my kids.

Becky Kiser:

I love holidays.

Becky Kiser:

I love celebration.

Becky Kiser:

Obviously all the color you see is I, I like fun that funds

Becky Kiser:

an important value for me.

Becky Kiser:

so I like the celebrations.

Becky Kiser:

But I also felt lost in them and I wasn't sure how to do a lot of them, especially

Becky Kiser:

like those surrounding, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, and Halloween.

Becky Kiser:

what does this look like for us as Christians to

Becky Kiser:

celebrate all of these things?

Becky Kiser:

And.

Becky Kiser:

so that had me, I ended up doing some Advent studies, some Lent studies, and

Becky Kiser:

then Lifeway had reached out about doing a whole book over all the holidays.

Becky Kiser:

So that's a great resource guidebook for we talk about all the things.

Becky Kiser:

How do you have less chaos and more Jesus in your holiday moments?

Becky Kiser:

and when I released that book five years ago, It's interesting because

Becky Kiser:

it, it felt I guess we talk about leadership and choices and whenever

Becky Kiser:

that had come out, it did really well.

Becky Kiser:

And I also felt like this season's done and I, I shut down the ministry.

Becky Kiser:

And even though I was like a year out of the book being released, Things

Becky Kiser:

were going unbelievably well and I felt like it was just time for whatever was

Becky Kiser:

next, but I didn't know what that was.

Becky Kiser:

so that's where Tim, I was like, okay, we're going to shut the door

Becky Kiser:

on this ministry and just see.

Becky Kiser:

And I closed everything down in December and, three months

Becky Kiser:

later, COVID took over our world.

Becky Kiser:

And because I had closed things down, I had the capacity to just say to God,

Becky Kiser:

I have this white space now, Lord, how do you, how can I help your people?

Becky Kiser:

How can I help you?

Becky Kiser:

And as we were all in the midst of this really hard, impossible

Becky Kiser:

season of our lives, I was talking to friends who were just exhausted.

Becky Kiser:

Like we were all thrown into homeschooling and none of us playing to homeschool.

Becky Kiser:

And, we were all just stuck at home constantly.

Becky Kiser:

But then I would talk to colleagues of mine who were speakers and teachers and.

Becky Kiser:

Everybody was, all their events had been canceled.

Becky Kiser:

And for some of them, that was income that they relied on.

Becky Kiser:

It was also giftings that they loved using and could it now.

Becky Kiser:

and then I would talk to ministry leaders, women's pastors and other

Becky Kiser:

pastors, and they were like, we don't know how to reach our people.

Becky Kiser:

And so that's where I reached out to my brother, my partner in actual crime.

Becky Kiser:

and just said, because he's, his superpower is helping ministries

Becky Kiser:

maximize their impact online.

Becky Kiser:

And so I said, bro, I.

Becky Kiser:

All my retreats have been canceled.

Becky Kiser:

What if we, can we move a retreat online?

Becky Kiser:

Like I wouldn't even know how to do that.

Becky Kiser:

beyond a few zoom sessions, I'd not done much on Facebook lives.

Becky Kiser:

And so we decided let's, let's do this retreat and let's do an online women's

Becky Kiser:

retreat that was literally the name of it, Tim, like all my women's retreat.

Becky Kiser:

com.

Becky Kiser:

just simple, pure.

Becky Kiser:

I texted all my friends who were teachers asked if anybody would do it.

Becky Kiser:

We started posting on social media.

Becky Kiser:

And within a month, we had 50 teachers say yes to do a session and over

Becky Kiser:

almost 10, 000 women sign up to do it.

Becky Kiser:

And I share that story because it was so clear.

Becky Kiser:

Sometimes God closes something that's good and we don't know why, but

Becky Kiser:

I had this space then to do this.

Becky Kiser:

And that's where things really began to pivot out of the holiday focus for

Becky Kiser:

me and into, okay, you have this life coach voice, you love teaching the Bible.

Becky Kiser:

How do we, how do we hone that?

Becky Kiser:

How do we really focus in on that?

Becky Kiser:

And so that's where things have really transitioned for me from, from doing

Becky Kiser:

that event into, let's just focus on helping women live exactly where they

Becky Kiser:

are in the life, our life now, thankfully for all of us, four years later, we are

Becky Kiser:

no longer COVID still exists, but our lives are as normal as they'll ever be.

Becky Kiser:

Like

Tim Winders:

Yeah,

Becky Kiser:

we're still not normal.

Becky Kiser:

Totally.

Tim Winders:

going on.

Tim Winders:

And, and one of the things that we often see, and I'm sure you see within

Tim Winders:

your Bible study, is that many people believe that Jesus would be like the,

Tim Winders:

the magic pill or the silver bullet.

Tim Winders:

I get saved and my life just works out perfectly.

Tim Winders:

I think sometimes the church Promotes that a little bit.

Tim Winders:

And it's led to this word we hear a lot.

Tim Winders:

And I think you bring it up in your book, this, this term called self

Tim Winders:

help, this whole thing that you can take charge of anything that might be

Tim Winders:

wrong or bad or anything like that.

Tim Winders:

And you can fix it, correct it, counsel it out, all of that.

Tim Winders:

That wasn't a negative on counseling.

Tim Winders:

It's the mindset.

Tim Winders:

To me, it seems that, but God can is a counter to self help.

Tim Winders:

Am I right about that?

Becky Kiser:

That was the intention in writing it.

Becky Kiser:

And as I was pitching it to publishers, it is, it is meant

Becky Kiser:

to be not an attack against it.

Becky Kiser:

Because truthfully, as a life coach, as someone who grew up with a mother

Becky Kiser:

earth nature, I do see the value in all of those things that it's not

Becky Kiser:

that it's just all wasted or stupid.

Becky Kiser:

It's that it's, it's hollow, right?

Becky Kiser:

So there is.

Becky Kiser:

Great value on the surface, but then what is it like when life actually hits, right?

Becky Kiser:

Like when kids are in a bad mood and everybody's yelling at each other, when

Becky Kiser:

diagnosis is hit, when relationships fail, when you feel alone, when bank

Becky Kiser:

accounts don't balance, then what?

Becky Kiser:

Because our self help culture is all about your mindset and doing this.

Becky Kiser:

And at a certain point, you can't keep just fake it till you make it.

Becky Kiser:

That's where we're struggling as we're trying to do what the

Becky Kiser:

self help world is teaching us.

Becky Kiser:

And they're not bad principles.

Becky Kiser:

But what the gospel says is on your own you actually can't so stop trying

Becky Kiser:

to feel like you got this you can do anything Just make it happen.

Becky Kiser:

The gospel message is on our own We can't but God can that's why he had to send

Becky Kiser:

his son Jesus to live a perfect life on earth Show us the way and then die for our

Becky Kiser:

sins so that we could all have new life For us as Christians, we have to start

Becky Kiser:

acknowledging, listen, I can't do it all.

Becky Kiser:

I say that to my girls all the time, which is so contrary

Becky Kiser:

to what they hear at school.

Becky Kiser:

I'm sure I've I tell them you can't do it all and you can't be anything.

Becky Kiser:

That's actually really good news.

Becky Kiser:

That takes the pressure off of them.

Becky Kiser:

And I've been saying, but you know what, with God, you can do the very thing

Becky Kiser:

he's called and equipped you to do.

Becky Kiser:

So all those stories we hear about David killing Goliath, he can do

Becky Kiser:

that because he had God behind him.

Becky Kiser:

Our David being the youngest and the smallest, but then becoming King, we can,

Becky Kiser:

he was able to do that because God saw him and chose him and called him out and

Becky Kiser:

anointed him and then led him through all the other things he had accomplished.

Becky Kiser:

So we too, in each of our weaknesses.

Becky Kiser:

God can say, listen, I do have a purpose for you.

Becky Kiser:

I can do things through you even though you are so weak on your own.

Becky Kiser:

You're supposed to be, you're human, but I can do anything with you.

Becky Kiser:

Would you let me, would you let me?

Tim Winders:

Hmm.

Tim Winders:

There's a word.

Tim Winders:

I think it's striving.

Tim Winders:

Do you have that?

Tim Winders:

How to stop striving.

Tim Winders:

Boy, I'm seeing this quite a bit.

Tim Winders:

And I had this in a conversation that was last week that the listener can go

Tim Winders:

back and check out with, with a male that would be in a very Alan Morris,

Tim Winders:

very successful role that he hit a wall at 47 and realized he was trying

Tim Winders:

to do too much for too many people.

Tim Winders:

His bio is awesome, all this kind of stuff.

Tim Winders:

And he had, he got broken down and, and, and had to.

Tim Winders:

Change things.

Tim Winders:

Talk about that word, striving, and I'll just throw one more thing in with it.

Tim Winders:

To me, it seems as if today, because I'm of the age now, I'm straddling

Tim Winders:

a couple of generations here.

Tim Winders:

I'm the tail end of baby boomers.

Tim Winders:

I'm 60 years old and I could remember pre internet, pre 24 7 news.

Tim Winders:

And I can tell you, we had a couple of things going on, but we did not have as

Tim Winders:

much going on as we've got going on now.

Tim Winders:

It seems like Becky, we're trying to do too much.

Tim Winders:

We're striving and trying to prove something to either God or everybody else.

Tim Winders:

So anyway, that's my softball for you to talk about striving.

Tim Winders:

How do we stop striving?

Becky Kiser:

It's hard to say stop striving because so many of

Becky Kiser:

the things we're striving to do are things that we have to do.

Becky Kiser:

So it's not something that, okay, I listened to this podcast and Becky and

Becky Kiser:

Tim, they shared so many great ideas.

Becky Kiser:

I tomorrow's my day.

Becky Kiser:

I'm no longer striving.

Becky Kiser:

This is the long game again, right?

Becky Kiser:

This is the long game again.

Becky Kiser:

And even last year, it's really funny.

Becky Kiser:

As I was editing my book, I was very convicted and there were things in it that

Becky Kiser:

we realized as I was going through it, There's still areas I'm striving, right?

Becky Kiser:

Cause it's constantly a process and a journey.

Becky Kiser:

And there's ways we're training our girls to strive.

Becky Kiser:

So for example, at the time of writing it, all three of my girls were competitive

Becky Kiser:

dancers and Tim, they were great at it.

Becky Kiser:

so good.

Becky Kiser:

And the dance studio was our family and all of that, but it took a lot of money,

Becky Kiser:

a lot of time to be there and to do that.

Becky Kiser:

And we realized as a family, This is our weight.

Becky Kiser:

Like we are striving and we were training our girls to strive.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm not saying competitive sports are bad for other people.

Becky Kiser:

I think all of us have to evaluate year to year, but we were also in the middle

Becky Kiser:

of a season when we felt that conviction.

Becky Kiser:

So we couldn't quit.

Becky Kiser:

Like we were still in it.

Becky Kiser:

And, but we had made the decision.

Becky Kiser:

We weren't going to do it.

Becky Kiser:

But then at the last minute, our girls were like devastated.

Becky Kiser:

This was their family.

Becky Kiser:

This was all they knew.

Becky Kiser:

And so we went ahead and let them audition.

Becky Kiser:

Of course they made it and we were stuck again.

Becky Kiser:

And, three weeks after that, before they did casting the

Becky Kiser:

studio, we had to tell that we've felt that conviction of the Lord.

Becky Kiser:

this is a year we're back in this for a year.

Becky Kiser:

And so we pulled out and we said, listen, I know we are,

Becky Kiser:

yes, we want our yes to be, yes.

Becky Kiser:

We want our commitments to be strong, but at the end of the day,

Becky Kiser:

this is not best for our family.

Becky Kiser:

And it was a hard transition for them because this was their friendship.

Becky Kiser:

This is how they found a lot of work.

Becky Kiser:

It was, gave them a lot of energy.

Becky Kiser:

It took a lot of energy and, it was a change, but our family

Becky Kiser:

is so much freer because of it.

Becky Kiser:

So much for your, because of it.

Becky Kiser:

So that's, that would be one practical example that I would

Becky Kiser:

say, stop striving, isn't something that you can do overnight, right?

Becky Kiser:

That was a journey.

Becky Kiser:

And it also, it also wasn't easy at first.

Becky Kiser:

It was like, Oh no, now we've made a mistake.

Becky Kiser:

And we also can't change our mind for another year, Once we got out of it.

Becky Kiser:

So I would just say, take it to the Lord and ask him, where am I striving that

Becky Kiser:

maybe I can calm down and like for your daughter, it sounds like for her, even

Becky Kiser:

being on Instagram was something that increased that drive to be something she

Becky Kiser:

wasn't, which would have been striving.

Becky Kiser:

And so trust the spirit within you.

Becky Kiser:

We are given this helper.

Becky Kiser:

Ask the Holy Spirit to show you where am I striving and then have

Becky Kiser:

faith enough to try stopping.

Becky Kiser:

And it's as simple as bit right.

Becky Kiser:

We talk about that in the book, taking baby steps and leaps of faith.

Becky Kiser:

Okay.

Becky Kiser:

What's a very practical baby step that you can take.

Becky Kiser:

And your daughter took Instagram off her phone.

Becky Kiser:

Genius.

Becky Kiser:

Now, can she still put it back on her phone?

Becky Kiser:

Could she log on from her computer?

Becky Kiser:

For sure.

Becky Kiser:

But that's a baby step she took to not strive on Instagram anymore.

Tim Winders:

The thing that I love about what you just said, and I'm going

Tim Winders:

to ask how it's played out with that practical thing with your daughters.

Tim Winders:

We had, we had our daughter and our son, and one of the, I don't even know if it

Tim Winders:

was a rule, but just principles of our family is that you can only have one,

Tim Winders:

maybe one and a half extracurricular activities, outside of schooling and we

Tim Winders:

homeschooled most of the time, but there were times that our children went in and

Tim Winders:

out of a private school or public school.

Tim Winders:

And I think that helped us.

Tim Winders:

But our daughter, very similar to your daughter's, she started

Tim Winders:

doing ballet at a very young age and was really, really good at it.

Tim Winders:

And at a teenage age, was looking at a pre pro program with the Atlanta Ballet.

Tim Winders:

Boy, I'm telling you what, if you want to see my head spin and

Tim Winders:

green stuff come out of my mouth, just start the nutcracker music.

Tim Winders:

I, oh my goodness gracious, I saw the nutcracker more than I want.

Tim Winders:

Anyway, sorry, I digress.

Becky Kiser:

a, it's a weird, it's a weird ballet for sure.

Tim Winders:

It is, and you know what happened with us?

Tim Winders:

It was very similar.

Tim Winders:

We were like discussing it as a family.

Tim Winders:

We felt like that season was over, but we didn't want to be bad stewards as parents.

Tim Winders:

And she went on a trip.

Tim Winders:

As an almost pre pro with the pros, I think Asheville, North

Tim Winders:

Carolina, this was Atlanta ballet.

Tim Winders:

And you know what?

Tim Winders:

When she came back, we've been praying about it.

Tim Winders:

We've been saying, Lord, what do we need to do about this?

Tim Winders:

It doesn't feel right.

Tim Winders:

She came back and she says, I'm finished with ballet.

Tim Winders:

And we said, why?

Tim Winders:

She goes, I don't want to keep going down that path.

Tim Winders:

I don't want the next steps of them dieting and they're smoking to keep their

Tim Winders:

weight off and they're compromising and their bodies are very, and you know what

Tim Winders:

we said, how will you praise the Lord?

Tim Winders:

So part of it is.

Tim Winders:

But God can trusting in God.

Tim Winders:

So has everything been okay with the girls with that practical

Tim Winders:

decision that's been made?

Becky Kiser:

I would say at first it wasn't okay.

Becky Kiser:

Like at first they were very alone.

Becky Kiser:

They They were no longer with their friends and not even cause

Becky Kiser:

their friends left them out.

Becky Kiser:

It's because their friends were still at the studio 20 hours a week and

Becky Kiser:

they just practically weren't there.

Becky Kiser:

and they were like, they were bored again, which I loved because I was

Becky Kiser:

like, my kids have not been bored in years and they wrestled with what,

Becky Kiser:

what, what does boredom look like?

Becky Kiser:

How are we bored?

Becky Kiser:

And, but now what I.

Becky Kiser:

Eight months later was zero.

Becky Kiser:

They have zero, we had zero regrets pretty early on.

Becky Kiser:

And I would say they are all on board with it now and thriving in different ways.

Becky Kiser:

My oldest is just made the cheer team at her school and she made it easily because

Becky Kiser:

of the training she'd had in dance.

Becky Kiser:

She had so many of those skills and now she has all these friends at

Becky Kiser:

school, which she didn't have time to have friends at school before,

Becky Kiser:

because she left early for dancing.

Becky Kiser:

Her bestest life friends were at the studio.

Becky Kiser:

my middle daughter has struggled the most as a fifth grader because she can't,

Becky Kiser:

there's not activities at school yet.

Becky Kiser:

but even that I've seen a lack of drama in her life and her.

Becky Kiser:

Figuring out who she is and making new friendships.

Becky Kiser:

And, there's so much personal growth she has had that she

Becky Kiser:

won't be able to appreciate yet.

Becky Kiser:

But I think in the next couple of years, she will be very grateful for.

Becky Kiser:

And then my youngest man, it's been really fun just to see her be

Becky Kiser:

like a normal elementary school kid who has play dates after school.

Becky Kiser:

She's.

Becky Kiser:

She, you would love her too, because she is just like a little entrepreneur.

Becky Kiser:

She has started her and one of her best friends have been selling bracelets

Becky Kiser:

on the curb of our neighborhood.

Becky Kiser:

Like that at the entrance of our neighborhood that they would make

Becky Kiser:

and the business slowed down.

Becky Kiser:

So they've started, we went to Costco and now they have a snack

Becky Kiser:

shop and they sell their bracelets.

Becky Kiser:

They made 38 on their first day at the curb and only spent 28 at Costco.

Becky Kiser:

So like they're already.

Becky Kiser:

She would have never done that had she been at the dance

Becky Kiser:

studio five hours that day.

Becky Kiser:

And so there are things like that, that we're seeing and that they're

Becky Kiser:

starting to see of, okay, this was a win, but it was hard at first.

Becky Kiser:

And for all of us changing, going from just staying on that hamster wheel,

Becky Kiser:

but then saying, I'm going to stop the striving and God, I'm going to go to

Becky Kiser:

you and I'm going to live purposefully.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm going to find abundance, which is so different than what America teaches.

Becky Kiser:

When we do that, when we say yes to God in those capacities, while

Becky Kiser:

it takes time, there is this fruitfulness that comes from it.

Becky Kiser:

That's the abundance, right?

Becky Kiser:

So yes, she made 38, but what she got out of that was she was rejected by a hundred

Becky Kiser:

cars that drove by and didn't stop.

Becky Kiser:

And she kept cheering and trying to flag cars down.

Becky Kiser:

There were, so there's all these things she's learned that were wins.

Becky Kiser:

And what I've learned is.

Becky Kiser:

Man, trust the spirit in you.

Becky Kiser:

I doubted it at first, which is why I let them try out.

Becky Kiser:

And I learned, no, Becky, when you send something, you can listen to

Becky Kiser:

that spirit, the spirit within you and trust it because it's right.

Becky Kiser:

It's good.

Becky Kiser:

And it will be okay.

Becky Kiser:

Even if it's going to be hard.

Tim Winders:

The cool thing about that is, is I believe I know I've

Tim Winders:

been guilty of this, that I could get so busy doing quote unquote good

Tim Winders:

things that there's no room for God.

Tim Winders:

To jump in.

Tim Winders:

I love the selling bracelet story.

Tim Winders:

We're in an RV resort near Sedona, Arizona right now.

Tim Winders:

And I go out and I'll listen to podcasts.

Tim Winders:

I might've been even listening to yours and I'm doing my walking and I go by this

Tim Winders:

little table beside an RV and there are three girls sitting there and I don't.

Tim Winders:

My wife doesn't let me have cash because of situations just like this.

Tim Winders:

And, and so I look at them and they've got bracelets and some

Tim Winders:

things that they've made, and I don't even know what a lot of it is.

Tim Winders:

And so I come hustling back to the RV and I said, glory, glory, glory, get some

Tim Winders:

cash, we got to go out because there's some girls up here selling some stuff

Tim Winders:

and I could tell they weren't getting a lot of traffic here within the RV resort.

Tim Winders:

There's only 400 spots here.

Tim Winders:

So we went back up there and, and I told the girls I may come back with my wife.

Tim Winders:

And when they saw me come in, I could tell they were a little bit excited.

Tim Winders:

And then we went up there and my wife only had twenties and she

Tim Winders:

was just looking and all of that.

Tim Winders:

And if it were to have been me, I would have given them a 20 and

Tim Winders:

gotten a couple of bracelets.

Tim Winders:

But she says, Hey, we need to go up to the office.

Tim Winders:

We're going to get changed.

Tim Winders:

And when we turned the corner, coming back from the office,

Tim Winders:

they were doing the dance.

Tim Winders:

They were like going here, they come.

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And It's you know what, man, I love that stuff.

Tim Winders:

I love that, that your girl's got that.

Tim Winders:

That's valuable training them up in the way that they should go.

Tim Winders:

Becky, but God can this book.

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I'm going to allow you at some time here, speak directly to whoever

Tim Winders:

this book is for and let them know that they need to get the book.

Tim Winders:

And then you could tell where they could find it.

Tim Winders:

But first let, let the person know who should get it.

Tim Winders:

Okay.

Tim Winders:

You know who they are.

Becky Kiser:

Yeah.

Becky Kiser:

For anyone who is listening, if you are a female, I would say if

Becky Kiser:

you've resonated with anything that we've talked about today, if

Becky Kiser:

you've resonated with the fact that.

Becky Kiser:

You feel like you're striving.

Becky Kiser:

You're on that hamster wheel.

Becky Kiser:

You don't know what your purpose is.

Becky Kiser:

You feel overwhelmed by the pressures, both within culture and within the church.

Becky Kiser:

And you need like that oxygen mask that the plane talks about,

Becky Kiser:

putting it on yourself so that you can breathe free again.

Becky Kiser:

But God can is for you.

Becky Kiser:

It's very, very practical where I coach you through each chapter.

Becky Kiser:

There's activities, there's questions to process, there's challenges.

Becky Kiser:

It's meant to feel like a coaching session where you have someone really

Becky Kiser:

guiding you through it for the men listening, which I know there's more

Becky Kiser:

men likely, hopefully still listening than women even is, I would say for

Becky Kiser:

you, this is, you're probably not going to grab this hot pink book.

Becky Kiser:

And I, I would say that's probably a smart decision, but you know what

Becky Kiser:

you have women in your life who want to be seen, who want to be heard.

Becky Kiser:

And so what a beautiful gift it would be for you to buy this and then attach

Becky Kiser:

a card to it that says, I see you.

Becky Kiser:

I see how hard you're working in your area of life.

Becky Kiser:

And I, I want to let you know, I believe in you.

Becky Kiser:

I know you feel overwhelmed by motherhood, but God can still use you in this moment.

Becky Kiser:

Or I know you feel lonely in this new emptiness or season of your life,

Becky Kiser:

but God still has a purpose for you.

Becky Kiser:

So I would challenge every man listening to grab a copy of this.

Becky Kiser:

On whatever is your preferred place to purchase products from and send it to

Becky Kiser:

all the significant women in your life and sit and let speak that affirmation

Becky Kiser:

over them that they need to hear.

Becky Kiser:

you asked where you can purchase this anywhere you buy books

Becky Kiser:

online, the book is sold.

Becky Kiser:

So if you shop at Amazon or target or Barnes and Noble or Walmart, whatever.

Becky Kiser:

com the book is there.

Becky Kiser:

So buy it.

Becky Kiser:

For yourself, send it to your friends.

Becky Kiser:

and then you can go to Becky Kaiser.

Becky Kiser:

com.

Becky Kiser:

I have a page dedicated to the book that has all kinds of free resources

Becky Kiser:

to download, to go along with it.

Becky Kiser:

I'll be doing some bonus teaching there, have some extra downloadables for people.

Becky Kiser:

And then I hang out the most on Instagram, which we've

Becky Kiser:

talked about quite a bit today.

Becky Kiser:

And I'm at Becky Kaiser K I S E R.

Becky Kiser:

And you'll find links to my site and the book and all of that on the page.

Becky Kiser:

And that would be the best place for us to connect in the DMs and

Becky Kiser:

the comments on posts that I have.

Tim Winders:

Excellent.

Tim Winders:

And at the time this episode is releasing, it's the book is released

Tim Winders:

and you, unfortunately men, you have missed mother's day, but it would have

Tim Winders:

been a great mother's day gift to give.

Tim Winders:

So be thinking about that.

Tim Winders:

Don't let any of the other

Becky Kiser:

You know what women like even more than a mother's day gift.

Becky Kiser:

We like a just because gift.

Becky Kiser:

So instead of just giving it to her on a day that you're supposed

Becky Kiser:

to give her something, just get it for her just cause you love her.

Tim Winders:

good sales there, especially for someone like me.

Tim Winders:

wife who her love language is gifts.

Tim Winders:

She let not G I F S but G I F T S she loves getting gifts.

Tim Winders:

So thank you, Becky.

Tim Winders:

What a great conversation.

Tim Winders:

We could continue speaking, but we're seek go create those three words.

Tim Winders:

Choose one.

Tim Winders:

Just don't ever think it, that means more to you.

Tim Winders:

Seek, go or create.

Tim Winders:

My last question, which one do you choose and why?

Becky Kiser:

I'm going to go with create.

Becky Kiser:

Typically I'm a goer, but I'm going to go with create.

Becky Kiser:

Cause right now I'm in a very creative space of we're doing a lot

Becky Kiser:

of updates and changes to our house.

Becky Kiser:

So I'm getting to get my hands dirty with paints and yard work.

Becky Kiser:

And, and then also with ministry and business and my next writing projects,

Becky Kiser:

just getting to really create.

Becky Kiser:

Open handedly go to the Lord and ask what's next for this.

Becky Kiser:

So I feel very in a creative mind space right now.

Tim Winders:

Very good.

Tim Winders:

Create.

Tim Winders:

Love it.

Tim Winders:

Love it.

Tim Winders:

Love it.

Tim Winders:

Becky.

Tim Winders:

Thanks so much for this conversation.

Tim Winders:

I highly encourage anyone listening to get, but God.

Tim Winders:

Can, and I love the subtitle, how to stop striving and live

Tim Winders:

purposefully and abundantly.

Tim Winders:

I love that.

Tim Winders:

So make sure you check that out.

Tim Winders:

Jump over to hearers and doers.

Tim Winders:

Also, if you're on a podcast platform right now, jump over there

Tim Winders:

and listen in with the with all that Becky's got going over there.

Tim Winders:

Great resource there also, unlike here where we've got 60 plus minute episodes.

Tim Winders:

She's got a few that are seven and 10 and 11 minutes long, which you

Tim Winders:

could get a number of those in when you're out walking for an hour.

Tim Winders:

So I have, I appreciate that someone in the world can be brief

Tim Winders:

and to the point, but anyway.

Tim Winders:

I appreciate you listening in here at SeatGo Create.

Tim Winders:

We've got new episodes on YouTube and on all your podcast platforms every Monday.

Tim Winders:

I appreciate you greatly listening in sharing and commenting and also rating

Tim Winders:

and reviewing us until next time continue being all that you were created to be.

About the Podcast

Show artwork for Seek Go Create - The Leadership Journey for Christian Entrepreneurs, Faith-Based Leaders, Purpose-Driven Success, Kingdom Business, Entrepreneurial Mindset, Leadership Development
Seek Go Create - The Leadership Journey for Christian Entrepreneurs, Faith-Based Leaders, Purpose-Driven Success, Kingdom Business, Entrepreneurial Mindset, Leadership Development

About your host

Profile picture for Tim Winders

Tim Winders

Tim Winders is a faith driven executive coach and author with over 40 years of experience in leadership, business, and ministry. Through his personal journey of redefining success, he has gained valuable insights on how to align beliefs with work and lead with purpose. He is committed to helping others do the same, running a coaching business that helps leaders, leadership teams, business owners, and entrepreneurs to align their beliefs with their work and redefine success.

In addition to his coaching business, Tim is also the host of the SeekGoCreate podcast and author of the book Coach: A Story of Success Redefined, which provides guidance for those looking to redefine success and align their beliefs with their work. With his extensive background, unique perspective and strengths in strategic thinking, relationship building, and problem-solving, Tim is well-suited to help clients navigate through difficult times and achieve their goals.