full

Connecting with God: Megan Nilsen’s Guide to Faithful Living and Journaling

Have you ever wondered how to truly anchor your identity in something greater than yourself, and hear a voice that guides and inspires you every day? In this episode of Seek Go Create, host Tim Winders sits down with Megan Nilsen, a dynamic life coach and author, to delve into her transformative journey of faith, motherhood, and journaling. Megan shares powerful insights on connecting deeply with God, breaking generational chains, and living out your divine purpose with grace. Tune in to discover practical tools and heartfelt stories that may just change the way you navigate your spiritual and personal journey.

"Journaling is a powerful tool to bring your confusion to light and seek God's guidance amidst the chaos." - Megan Nilsen

Access all show and episode resources HERE

About Our Guest:

Megan Nilsen is a dynamic content creator, life coach, podcaster, and author dedicated to guiding individuals in anchoring their identity in Christ and hearing God's voice. With a background in kingdom coaching, she has written two insightful books, "A Beautiful Exchange" and "Untangled Faith," complete with a companion journal tailored for small group or Bible study use. Megan's expertise extends to her unique 10-week guide for studying "Untangled Faith," addressing the needs of those seeking deeper spiritual connection. Her innovative concepts, such as two-way journaling, and her heartfelt approach to overcoming life’s challenges, make Megan a sought-after speaker and mentor for those navigating their spiritual and personal journeys.

Reasons to Listen:

1. **Unlock Journaling Secrets**: Discover Megan Nilsen's approach to "two-way journaling," a transformative tool for hearing God's voice and deepening spiritual connections.

2. **Explore Personal Growth**: Learn how Megan's journey of authenticity and faith empowered her to break generational chains and find her true purpose—insightful for anyone seeking similar breakthroughs.

3. **Practical Resources & Inspiration**: Access free tools like a litmus test for discerning God's voice and a guide to identifying a God-sized dream, plus practical insights for integrating journaling into your daily life.

Episode Resources & Action Steps:

### Resources Mentioned:

1. **Megan Nilsen's Books and Companion Journal:**

- **"A Beautiful Exchange"**

- **"Untangled Faith" with a companion journal**

- Available on Amazon, suitable for small group or Bible study.

2. **Megan Nilsen's Free Resources:**

- A litmus test for discerning God's voice

- Five questions to identify a God-sized dream.

3. **Megan Nilsen's Podcast and Website:**

- Megan's podcast, focusing on kingdom coaching and faith.

- Megan's website, where additional resources and information can be found.

### Action Steps:

1. **Start Two-Way Journaling:**

- Implement Megan Nilsen's practice of two-way journaling by writing out your thoughts and then listening for God's perspective, aiming for a two-way conversation with God.

2. **Begin a Small Group Study:**

- Gather a group and utilize Megan Nilsen's 10-week guide for "Untangled Faith" to facilitate discussions, using the provided podcast episode pairings, small group questions, and reflection questions.

3. **Utilize Free Tools for Discernment:**

- Download and use Megan's free resources (the litmus test for discerning God's voice and the five questions to identify a God-sized dream) to enhance your spiritual journey and understanding of God's direction in your life.

Resources for Leaders from Tim Winders & SGC:

🔹 Unlock Your Potential Today!

  • 🎙 Coaching with Tim: Elevate your leadership and align your work with your faith. Learn More
  • 📚 "Coach: A Story of Success Redefined": A transformative read that will challenge your views on success. Grab Your Copy
  • 📝 Faith Driven Leader Quiz: Discover how well you're aligning faith and work with our quick quiz. Take the Quiz

Key Lessons:

1. **Embracing Two-Way Journaling:**

- Megan Nilsen introduces the concept of two-way journaling, where individuals write out their thoughts and then listen for God's perspective, facilitating a two-way conversation and fostering deeper spiritual connection.

2. **Discerning God's Voice:**

- Megan offers valuable resources like a litmus test for discerning God's voice and five questions to identify a God-sized dream. These tools are designed to help listeners navigate their spiritual journeys with clarity and confidence.

3. **Breaking Generational Chains:**

- Through personal storytelling, Megan emphasizes the importance of breaking generational expectations and chains to embrace one's true self and live a life aligned with God's purpose.

4. **Journaling as Spiritual Practice:**

- Both Megan and Tim discuss the transformative power of journaling. Whether overcoming journaling phobia or creating meaningful routines, they highlight how journaling can bring clarity, peace, and a deeper connection to God.

5. **The Value of Quiet and Stillness:**

- In a world full of distractions, Megan underscores the importance of self-control, quiet, and stillness for self-reflection and spiritual growth. Taking intentional time away from technology can enhance one's ability to hear God's voice and connect spiritually.

Episode Highlights:

00:00 Introduction to Journaling and Connection with God

00:39 Meet Megan Nielsen: Life Coach and Content Creator

02:05 The Role of a Connector: Megan's Journey

12:14 Adoption and Spiritual Transformation

14:48 The Power of Honest Conversations with God

31:44 The Importance of Stillness and Focus

33:14 The Origin of Beautiful Exchange Journaling

35:35 Two-Way Journaling: A Deeper Connection

39:05 Overcoming Journal Phobia

42:47 Getting Started with Journaling

50:40 Resources and Final Thoughts

Thank you for listening to Seek Go Create!

Our podcast is dedicated to empowering Christian leaders, entrepreneurs, and individuals looking to redefine success in their personal and professional lives. Through in-depth interviews, personal anecdotes, and expert advice, we offer valuable insights and actionable strategies for achieving your goals and living a life of purpose and fulfillment.

If you enjoyed this episode and found it helpful, we encourage you to subscribe to or follow Seek Go Create on your favorite podcast platform, including Apple Podcasts, and Spotify. By subscribing, you'll never miss an episode and can stay up-to-date on the latest insights and strategies for success.

Additionally, please share this episode or what you’ve learned today with your friends, family, and colleagues on your favorite social media platform. By sharing our podcast, you can help us reach more people who are looking to align their faith with their work and lead with purpose.

For more updates and episodes, visit our website or follow us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter, TikTok and YouTube. We appreciate your support and look forward to helping you achieve your goals and create a life of purpose and fulfillment.

Now, you can tip us, buy us a coffee, or offer financial support. Contributions start at just $1, and if you leave a comment, you could be featured in a future episode!

Visit our Support page for more details.

Mentioned in this episode:

Overcome Leadership Challenges with Tim Winders

Feeling overwhelmed in your leadership journey? You're not alone. Tim Winders, your SeekGoCreate host, is here to guide you through those tough moments as an experienced executive coach. From mastering team dynamics to making strategic decisions and fostering personal growth, Tim offers the support you need to break through barriers and achieve what once seemed impossible. Don’t let challenges define your leadership. Book a free Discovery Coaching Call with Tim today and take the first step towards a path of greater success and satisfaction. It's time to transform your challenges into opportunities.

Book Coaching Call

Transcript
Megan Nilsen:

This journaling is for anyone who's hungry.

Megan Nilsen:

and curious to really be connected to God, to hear what he has to say.

Megan Nilsen:

Someone who really wants to live, by God's grace, by his love and by his guidance.

Megan Nilsen:

and someone who's like, but I'm not sure if I really know how to do that.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm not sure if I know how to hear his voice.

Megan Nilsen:

Does he really speak to me?

Megan Nilsen:

Um, uh,

Tim Winders:

How do you embrace the richness of life from Broadway tunes to

Tim Winders:

the depths of personal transformation while guiding others to discover their

Tim Winders:

own paths on today's episode of Seek, Go Create the Leadership Journey.

Tim Winders:

We welcome Megan Nielsen, a dynamic content creator, podcaster, life

Tim Winders:

coach, and author, passionately committed to helping others

Tim Winders:

live deeply connected lives.

Tim Winders:

Megan's life journey includes embracing her role as a mother, a wife, a

Tim Winders:

community leader, all while fostering deep connections through her love

Tim Winders:

for personality assessments, her work with Life Center Ethiopia, and her

Tim Winders:

service as an elder in her church.

Tim Winders:

Join us as Megan shares her insights on overcoming life's challenges.

Tim Winders:

The power of personal connections and how her faith has guided her

Tim Winders:

through significant life changes and into helping others navigate their

Tim Winders:

own spiritual and personal journeys.

Tim Winders:

Megan, welcome to Seek Go

Tim Winders:

Create.

Megan Nilsen:

you.

Megan Nilsen:

That sounds exciting.

Megan Nilsen:

I can't wait to listen to that interview.

Megan Nilsen:

Who is this person?

Tim Winders:

And, but you know, one of the things I just noticed as I

Tim Winders:

was going through this and we're going to kind of do some deep dive on

Tim Winders:

journaling and some things like that, but all that was woven into that.

Tim Winders:

But before we get rolling.

Tim Winders:

Other than what I just said, if someone asks you, it might

Tim Winders:

depend on where they are.

Tim Winders:

If someone asks you what you do, you're out and about or

Tim Winders:

something, what do you tell them?

Megan Nilsen:

Well it depends on whose perspective it is.

Megan Nilsen:

If you ask my kids, what do I do?

Megan Nilsen:

They would say she annoys me.

Megan Nilsen:

So there, there's that.

Megan Nilsen:

My kids are all between 17 and 23.

Megan Nilsen:

but I think the first thing that comes to my mind is that I just love

Megan Nilsen:

connecting with people, so I love connecting people to each other.

Megan Nilsen:

If you've ever done the strengths finders, Clifton strengths, connectedness

Megan Nilsen:

is definitely one of my top five.

Megan Nilsen:

So as far as what do I do, I'm constantly like.

Megan Nilsen:

Diving in with people, asking them deeper questions.

Megan Nilsen:

It could be in the grocery store line, which is super annoying for my kids.

Megan Nilsen:

but really ultimately I'm just a connector and I love to see

Megan Nilsen:

like, how did God design you?

Megan Nilsen:

What's your purpose?

Megan Nilsen:

And so I do that through motherhood.

Megan Nilsen:

I do that in my marriage.

Megan Nilsen:

I do that in my church and in my vocation.

Megan Nilsen:

So I'm always doing a deep dive with somebody with their personality,

Megan Nilsen:

their desires, their dreams.

Megan Nilsen:

And that's really what makes me tick all the time.

Tim Winders:

I love when people talk strength finders because that is, I

Tim Winders:

noticed you, and I like on your website that you actually put all of your,

Tim Winders:

uh, personality profile credentials.

Tim Winders:

It's like, wow, she's like right out there with all her Enneagram strength

Tim Winders:

finders, all this kind of stuff.

Tim Winders:

I've got mine in places, but it's a deeper place than you have to

Tim Winders:

look for it a little bit more.

Tim Winders:

But I string finders and my wife has a background in all this kind of stuff too.

Tim Winders:

That's kind of our favorite right now.

Tim Winders:

And we both are high strategy, but.

Tim Winders:

I have a lot of that connectedness in my top two, which is one of

Tim Winders:

the reasons why we're going to have a great conversation here.

Tim Winders:

So do the kids roll their eyes when you're in the grocery store and you start having

Tim Winders:

like a life type conversation with people?

Megan Nilsen:

Yeah.

Megan Nilsen:

It's like my kids, my kids, they just like, they start to cringe because they

Megan Nilsen:

see me if they, Hey, how's your day?

Megan Nilsen:

What are you up to?

Megan Nilsen:

And all of a sudden they're like, Oh, Don't do it.

Megan Nilsen:

Don't don't, don't ask them, you know, if the kids get in

Megan Nilsen:

the car with me and I'm driving.

Megan Nilsen:

So, but I've just learned to embrace it.

Megan Nilsen:

It's just who I am.

Megan Nilsen:

But at the same time, I really do realize that.

Megan Nilsen:

It might be offensive and it might be tough for my kids.

Megan Nilsen:

So I, I have been known to hold back a time or two, but it is, takes all the

Megan Nilsen:

self discipline in the world to do so.

Megan Nilsen:

Let me tell you,

Tim Winders:

were you always a connector?

Tim Winders:

Did you always reach out to people as far back as you can remember?

Tim Winders:

Or was that something you just started doing at some point in life?

Megan Nilsen:

I think I've always been a connector, but I haven't always had the

Megan Nilsen:

confidence to do so if that makes sense.

Megan Nilsen:

So I have grown in my 50 plus years on this earth and every

Megan Nilsen:

decade I feel like I become more and more who God created me to be.

Megan Nilsen:

So in some sense that connector person has always been, she's always existed,

Megan Nilsen:

but I've had to sift through a lot of.

Megan Nilsen:

self confidence issues, really finding my voice and trusting that when I put

Megan Nilsen:

myself out there and I want to connect with somebody, that's a really, like God

Megan Nilsen:

given thing versus, some other narrative that I may have believed over the years.

Megan Nilsen:

Like they don't really want to know you, you're being too nosy.

Megan Nilsen:

I've actually had to work to refine and hone that skill

Megan Nilsen:

and see God's design for it.

Megan Nilsen:

If that makes sense.

Tim Winders:

Cause what's interesting is I think I have

Tim Winders:

those similar, I'm wired that way.

Tim Winders:

And I have a vivid memory of going with my grandfather to what used to be

Tim Winders:

called the old folks home in Aberdeen, Mississippi, and he would go up and down.

Tim Winders:

It was just like a one.

Tim Winders:

Corridor hall.

Tim Winders:

And he would go to each door, look and see if he knew who they were.

Tim Winders:

And we would walk in and just start talking to people.

Tim Winders:

And he wasn't a deeply, I don't think spiritual man.

Tim Winders:

I don't think it was like ministry.

Tim Winders:

He just was taught.

Tim Winders:

And I was like four years old, five years old, walking up and down with him.

Tim Winders:

And I remember thinking that was the way I was or the way I should be or something.

Tim Winders:

Like that.

Tim Winders:

And, and it kind of, I've always been that way

Tim Winders:

since that

Tim Winders:

time.

Tim Winders:

I don't know if that unlocked it for me.

Tim Winders:

I don't know if that gave me the confidence, but what I want to circle

Tim Winders:

back to you on is what squelched it along the way, what was some of the

Tim Winders:

limiting factors for you stepping into what now you just mentioned 50

Tim Winders:

something years in, you were created for in the first place at the foundation.

Megan Nilsen:

yeah, I've done a lot of therapy over the years.

Megan Nilsen:

I can kind of joke about this at the outset, but truly like I've

Megan Nilsen:

had to do some deep work about what the origin of that was.

Megan Nilsen:

And I will say, In a measured way that there is some generational

Megan Nilsen:

expectations and narratives and like a critical nature that has been

Megan Nilsen:

kind of passed on through the years.

Megan Nilsen:

So, as you can see, I'm trying to be very diplomatic about how I say

Megan Nilsen:

that, in love and honor and respect, but somehow I really embraced.

Megan Nilsen:

Like go along to get along type of thing.

Megan Nilsen:

I think there was something about, I've actually done a lot of work in

Megan Nilsen:

therapy and other settings of like, who is the girl that thinks that she needs

Megan Nilsen:

to be perfect and do everything well.

Megan Nilsen:

And it needs to be sort of in this window of expectation and acceptable behavior.

Megan Nilsen:

And so not like being inquisitive and connecting with other

Megan Nilsen:

people is unacceptable behavior.

Megan Nilsen:

But, I think that's part of the thing that I've had to really.

Megan Nilsen:

Refine and prune and prune and refine over the years is that, I can get

Megan Nilsen:

messy and I can ask people deep questions and they can ask me deep

Megan Nilsen:

questions and I can say real answers.

Megan Nilsen:

but that is not something that.

Megan Nilsen:

Came very naturally to me because it felt messy and there must have been some

Megan Nilsen:

reason why I adapted to a very measured, like, be careful what you say, be

Megan Nilsen:

careful who you are type of, personality.

Megan Nilsen:

And it's been really fun and stretching and challenging over these past probably

Megan Nilsen:

12 to 15 years to step into the real me and who God has created me to be.

Megan Nilsen:

Honoring the past, honoring those generations and knowing that God has

Megan Nilsen:

really given me a vision of where some generational chains are being broken.

Megan Nilsen:

So that's a much deeper topic, that my husband and I feel

Megan Nilsen:

really passionate about.

Megan Nilsen:

how are we creating a family, and a family line and a legacy that

Megan Nilsen:

is honoring the good that has been passed down over the generations

Megan Nilsen:

recognizing where some strongholds have been and breaking those chains.

Megan Nilsen:

that's kind of what comes to my mind when you asked me that question,

Tim Winders:

So the tough thing about that, my wife, I kind of

Tim Winders:

heard some things that I've heard from my wife in the way you were.

Tim Winders:

Discussing that.

Tim Winders:

And my wife said that when she was young, she was bubbly, happy,

Tim Winders:

cheery, all this type stuff.

Tim Winders:

And her father who's passed now used to say in no uncertain terms, you

Tim Winders:

talk too much, would you shut up?

Tim Winders:

you know, even said something to the effect of that she had diarrhea of the

Tim Winders:

mouth which she actually remembers that, now 55 years later, and she thinks it

Tim Winders:

sort of squelched her that she became more introverted, quiet, things like that.

Tim Winders:

So I do think that's interesting.

Tim Winders:

And I love what you brought up that you are attempting within your

Tim Winders:

family To change those paradigms.

Tim Winders:

One of the things I'd love to know now, because I think some of this kind of

Tim Winders:

goes into how we communicate with God.

Tim Winders:

I think how we're wired and some of those things that you're talking about,

Tim Winders:

when we start doing this beautiful exchange journaling, we're going to

Tim Winders:

talk about in just a moment, I think it impacts it because some people.

Tim Winders:

Have that same mindset when they try to go before the Lord, tell me, give

Tim Winders:

me some high points, low points, whatever we might need to know about

Tim Winders:

your spiritual journey, your spiritual walk, how you came to be Megan, the

Tim Winders:

spiritual powerhouse that you are

Tim Winders:

now.

Megan Nilsen:

my middle name.

Megan Nilsen:

Megan's spiritual powerhouse, Nelson.

Megan Nilsen:

you know, I, I'll start with my most recent book and I'm sure

Megan Nilsen:

we're going to talk about this.

Megan Nilsen:

It's called untangled faith and the subtitle is how

Megan Nilsen:

honest conversations with God.

Megan Nilsen:

Lead to deeper connections, clarity, and peace.

Megan Nilsen:

We've already kind of been hovering around this idea of connections and, really

Megan Nilsen:

being connected to God and other people.

Megan Nilsen:

And I think as I'm reflecting, even talking to you, when I think about why

Megan Nilsen:

are honest conversations important to me.

Megan Nilsen:

I think it stems from the question that you just asked me about,

Megan Nilsen:

like sharing my voice and it is what I'm thinking and feeling.

Megan Nilsen:

Okay.

Megan Nilsen:

And I did grow up in the church.

Megan Nilsen:

I did grow up in a small town Methodist church, and it was really

Megan Nilsen:

lovely because we had to show up.

Megan Nilsen:

every week and we learned how to talk to different generations of people.

Megan Nilsen:

I really was able to hone that skill of being present and in community.

Megan Nilsen:

But somehow along the way, I just sort of became a very measured church girl.

Megan Nilsen:

Like this is how she's supposed to be.

Megan Nilsen:

And if she's not like this, then something's wrong with me.

Megan Nilsen:

That's embarrassing.

Megan Nilsen:

That's shameful.

Megan Nilsen:

And I have some just moments even of my growing up life where I would,

Megan Nilsen:

I was thinking I, I'm being honest.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm sharing something really deep and vulnerable and private.

Megan Nilsen:

And when I did that, it wasn't received.

Megan Nilsen:

with openness and grace.

Megan Nilsen:

And so all of a sudden I learned to kind of shut down that interior feeling or that

Megan Nilsen:

interior dialogue of like, Oh gosh, if I'm thinking this or experiencing this,

Megan Nilsen:

then that must not be okay with God.

Megan Nilsen:

And that really is not okay with the church.

Megan Nilsen:

So I'm going to have to kind of live this duplicitous life where I kind

Megan Nilsen:

of present one way on the outside.

Megan Nilsen:

Everything's great.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm fine.

Megan Nilsen:

I can do this all, but really inside maybe I'm struggling with some things.

Megan Nilsen:

So.

Megan Nilsen:

To put all this in perspective, 12 years ago, my husband and I,

Megan Nilsen:

we had two biological children.

Megan Nilsen:

We adopted our youngest two kids from Ethiopia in 2011.

Megan Nilsen:

Really, that's a whole journey of hearing from the Lord, inviting

Megan Nilsen:

his, really sensing his invitation to grow our family in this way.

Megan Nilsen:

And when they came home, as you might imagine, it was very, very difficult.

Megan Nilsen:

anybody who's familiar with adoption in any way, shape or

Megan Nilsen:

form understands the trauma and the brokenness inherent in that.

Megan Nilsen:

Right.

Megan Nilsen:

We are designed to grow up with our original caregivers.

Megan Nilsen:

And when that is broken for whatever reason, then we have all kinds of

Megan Nilsen:

things and attachment, complications.

Megan Nilsen:

So they come home, and I'm an absolute wreck.

Megan Nilsen:

there's this moment of, okay, God, I thought we heard you and we were

Megan Nilsen:

making this, Christian decision to grow our family in this way.

Megan Nilsen:

And now life is really hard.

Megan Nilsen:

It feels unbearable for All of us in the home because of just the

Megan Nilsen:

trauma that everybody's experiencing.

Megan Nilsen:

Maybe we didn't hear you right.

Megan Nilsen:

Maybe we didn't make the right decision.

Megan Nilsen:

And for someone who really values making the right decision,

Megan Nilsen:

because that's just going to be an easier way to get through life.

Megan Nilsen:

All of a sudden I was like, I think we made a massive mistake.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't think we should have done this for all kinds of reasons.

Megan Nilsen:

and so I ended up going to counseling.

Megan Nilsen:

my sweet husband was just trying every which way to keep the family

Megan Nilsen:

afloat, to keep everybody above water.

Megan Nilsen:

he was like, I'm doing everything I can.

Megan Nilsen:

I think you need to talk to somebody because especially the mom of the

Megan Nilsen:

household, if somebody is going down, a rising tide rises all ships, right?

Megan Nilsen:

if I'm the matriarch and the temperature of my home and I'm going down, I have

Megan Nilsen:

so much anxiety and, low key depression he said, you need to go to counseling.

Megan Nilsen:

So I went to counseling.

Megan Nilsen:

And I sat on my counselor's couch and I was kind of boohooing

Megan Nilsen:

about how hard life was.

Megan Nilsen:

And I thought we heard God, I, maybe we didn't hear him right.

Megan Nilsen:

I have no idea what to do.

Megan Nilsen:

I think we're in just as like, we cannot figure out how to rectify this mess.

Megan Nilsen:

And she looked at me and she said, you know, that motherhood's not

Megan Nilsen:

your highest and greatest calling.

Megan Nilsen:

Right.

Megan Nilsen:

And I said, no, I did not know that that's all I'm doing.

Megan Nilsen:

We went from two kids to four kids.

Megan Nilsen:

And I was actually listening to one of your podcasts with Becky Kaiser recently.

Megan Nilsen:

And she was talking about this idea of motherhood and calling and really being

Megan Nilsen:

our greatest calling as, as women and as human being is, is to be connected

Megan Nilsen:

to the Lord, to be a daughter of the King, to be a son of the King, It's

Megan Nilsen:

like, I'm a daughter of the King, then.

Megan Nilsen:

everything needs to flow from that.

Megan Nilsen:

So that to me in a very long winded answer to your question is how did my

Megan Nilsen:

spiritual life, how did I become this quote, spiritual powerhouse, which I

Megan Nilsen:

don't feel like I am, but I am putting a lot of energy into it because it

Megan Nilsen:

has radically transformed my life.

Megan Nilsen:

And probably the verse that comes to mind is in Romans chapter eight

Megan Nilsen:

when Paul says the flesh brings death and the spirit brings life.

Megan Nilsen:

And I had this moment when I'm sitting on my, on my counselor's couch and I'm

Megan Nilsen:

thinking, Everything that I'm holding onto right now, the flesh, the need to

Megan Nilsen:

control, the need to, expect a certain behavior from my kids and expect,

Megan Nilsen:

this attachments to be going well.

Megan Nilsen:

My flesh was really muscling things out and getting very, very tired.

Megan Nilsen:

And so in that moment, sitting on her couch, she was giving me

Megan Nilsen:

this invitation, this a new way.

Megan Nilsen:

It's like, Jesus says, I've come to bring you life.

Megan Nilsen:

Like the old is gone.

Megan Nilsen:

The new has come.

Megan Nilsen:

I had that moment where I'm like, okay, everything I've.

Megan Nilsen:

Constructed about who I'm supposed to be in the faith.

Megan Nilsen:

And as a human, as a woman in the church, as a mom is kind of being

Megan Nilsen:

put up before me and I'm having to deconstruct, what does that look like?

Megan Nilsen:

And why is this so hard?

Megan Nilsen:

And all of a sudden she said, the spirit's going to bring you life.

Megan Nilsen:

When you're filled up, With the love of God and the grace of God, then

Megan Nilsen:

it will inform your marriage and your parenting and your creativity,

Megan Nilsen:

everything else that flows from that.

Megan Nilsen:

So that to me was the most pivotal point when things shifted.

Megan Nilsen:

And all of a sudden, so the past 12 years I've been on this journey of, Oh my

Megan Nilsen:

goodness, what does that actually mean?

Megan Nilsen:

And so I think the honest conversations bit is, okay, I am feeling this.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm experiencing this is hard.

Megan Nilsen:

This is hard and God is good and he has something to show you and

Megan Nilsen:

he has something to teach you.

Megan Nilsen:

So that's really like the crux of where I sit in my vocational life, in my

Megan Nilsen:

spiritual life now is sitting in that tension, but always trusting towards

Megan Nilsen:

like God has something bigger and better than he wants to reveal even in the midst

Megan Nilsen:

of the heart and the, the suffering.

Tim Winders:

Have you, is that the timeframe when you believe you began

Tim Winders:

having conversations with God, period?

Tim Winders:

Or were you already conversing with him, but it maybe was just in a different

Tim Winders:

way prior to that 2011, 12, 13 timeframe

Tim Winders:

you brought up?

Megan Nilsen:

I mean, I've been a prayerful person growing up in the

Megan Nilsen:

church and I've enjoyed writing ever since I was young, but what I found in

Megan Nilsen:

that time specifically was that writing with God, conversing with God, if it's

Megan Nilsen:

out loud through your mouth or written through your words on a piece of paper,

Megan Nilsen:

became a form of therapy to me because I was able to write out some things.

Megan Nilsen:

I think a lot of musicians talk about this, authors, writers.

Megan Nilsen:

They have some feelings that are wrapped up and tangled up inside

Megan Nilsen:

and it's so healthy to get them out.

Megan Nilsen:

So what's the medium that you're going to use to get these things out?

Megan Nilsen:

Some people might use physical activity.

Megan Nilsen:

So for me it was writing.

Megan Nilsen:

And then I began to write with the Lord and say, Hey, this is hard

Megan Nilsen:

and I'm confused and I don't know if I'm hearing you right at all.

Megan Nilsen:

And then over time.

Megan Nilsen:

I was listening to other pastors and people talk about, okay, it's one thing

Megan Nilsen:

to write to God, to tell him all the honest things, to have your David moment

Megan Nilsen:

when you're just like, Hey, life sucks.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't know what to do now.

Megan Nilsen:

Then what do you do?

Megan Nilsen:

how do you access his wisdom?

Megan Nilsen:

How do you listen for his voice?

Megan Nilsen:

Cause it's one thing.

Megan Nilsen:

Think about any natural relationship you have.

Megan Nilsen:

If you had a problem with your wife and you just kind of unleashed on

Megan Nilsen:

her and said, Hey, here's all the problems I have and the questions I

Megan Nilsen:

have, and I don't know what to do.

Megan Nilsen:

And then you turned your back and you walked out and you shut the door.

Megan Nilsen:

She wouldn't have a chance to respond or say, I hear you.

Megan Nilsen:

Wow.

Megan Nilsen:

That's really hard to hear.

Megan Nilsen:

And here's my perspective.

Megan Nilsen:

So I felt like that's what I was doing with God.

Megan Nilsen:

It was like, Hey, this is all of my problems and I'm going to turn around

Megan Nilsen:

and walk out and just dump my problems.

Megan Nilsen:

and so when he really invited me to start listening for him and then writing down

Megan Nilsen:

what I was hearing, the impressions, the visions that were coming to me, that's

Megan Nilsen:

what opened up this whole new world of, wow, you can really access God's wisdom

Megan Nilsen:

if you're paying attention and you're super honest and you're laying it out

Megan Nilsen:

there and then you're asking for his perspective to lay over top of that.

Megan Nilsen:

That's really where the journaling came in, that I feel so passionate

Megan Nilsen:

about cause I love seeing people equipped to hear God for themselves.

Megan Nilsen:

We know more than we think we know.

Megan Nilsen:

We can hear him better than we think we can hear him.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause that's probably the biggest question I get is how do I know

Megan Nilsen:

if it's God's voice or my voice?

Megan Nilsen:

it feels really, really powerful.

Megan Nilsen:

At least to me, it has been in a lot of people I've worked with.

Tim Winders:

I do.

Tim Winders:

I want us to talk about even some of the practical aspects of this

Tim Winders:

beautiful exchange journaling.

Tim Winders:

However.

Tim Winders:

I do think there is a soul or mindset or whatever we want to call it.

Tim Winders:

perspective that needs to be addressed.

Tim Winders:

Cause there are people that one, they don't feel worthy to.

Tim Winders:

Come before the Lord There is what you just brought up, which is maybe you were

Tim Winders:

taught to be a certain way growing up.

Tim Winders:

Also, unfortunately, I think there's some gender things that factor into this.

Tim Winders:

You mentioned, I heard you say church girl and woman in the church.

Tim Winders:

you know what, I don't ever say man in the church.

Tim Winders:

I don't ever bring that up.

Tim Winders:

It's like, I'm just.

Tim Winders:

So there are gender things that come into play here, whether

Tim Winders:

we want to admit it or not.

Tim Winders:

And I'm not saying they're good, but it's just the way it is.

Tim Winders:

But you brought up something in the book, somewhere in the middle of the book.

Tim Winders:

I did read Untangled Faith over the last few days.

Tim Winders:

You brought up the aspect of being an orphan.

Tim Winders:

And I think all of those things have varying degrees of orphan ism.

Tim Winders:

In them and I think it's so cool that y'all also have adopted because I think

Tim Winders:

the opposite of an orphan is someone who's been adopted and so I don't know

Tim Winders:

if there's going to be a question here.

Tim Winders:

Maybe it's just, can you talk more about.

Tim Winders:

Orphan or, or do anything that people need to do in preparation to begin

Tim Winders:

this process that a lot of people may struggle with sitting down and

Tim Winders:

actually communicating and connecting with God, their heavenly father.

Megan Nilsen:

Yeah.

Tim Winders:

again, not a question there, any

Tim Winders:

based on what I just said.

Megan Nilsen:

in fact, as you were speaking, I feel like I'm

Megan Nilsen:

getting a little emotional.

Megan Nilsen:

I could feel the tears kind of like right behind my eyes because adoption,

Megan Nilsen:

being an adoptive mom and adopting our kids has been the single biggest

Megan Nilsen:

experience in my life to really understand even a fraction of a level of how much

Megan Nilsen:

God loves us and what it must be like for him when we turn our backs on him.

Megan Nilsen:

And.

Megan Nilsen:

You know, kind of before I say anything more, I really do want to honor, and I

Megan Nilsen:

really respect the story of the actual orphan of people on this earth who have,

Megan Nilsen:

for whatever reason are not growing up in a loving home with their original

Megan Nilsen:

caregiver, their original mother and father, because that is a brokenness

Megan Nilsen:

that is so deep and it really can break the human spirit in a lot of ways.

Megan Nilsen:

So, I know that every story is very different and so I just want to

Megan Nilsen:

honor that and whatever I say from my perspective is just our experience and I

Megan Nilsen:

recognize that it can be very complicated and nuanced for a lot of people.

Megan Nilsen:

But when we brought our children home, they were five and seven, a boy and a

Megan Nilsen:

girl and they had been actually with their mother for quite some time of several

Megan Nilsen:

years growing up and she had relinquished them for extreme poverty and, illness.

Megan Nilsen:

And when they came home, it was just so difficult because they didn't understand

Megan Nilsen:

That they were part of a new family, of a new system, that everything that we have,

Megan Nilsen:

our name, any material possessions, our love is now theirs by extension because

Megan Nilsen:

they have been grafted into this family.

Megan Nilsen:

And you could just see them fighting against this because the human spirit is

Megan Nilsen:

so, we just want to protect ourselves.

Megan Nilsen:

if you've been hurt, neglected and abandoned at one point, then

Megan Nilsen:

what does the human spirit do?

Megan Nilsen:

Our human spirit wants to build up the wall because we

Megan Nilsen:

don't want to be hurt again.

Megan Nilsen:

I think anybody listening has experienced that in life, either with a love

Megan Nilsen:

relationship or something like that.

Megan Nilsen:

So to build that trust, For, as a parent perspective to build the trust

Megan Nilsen:

of my kids has been our life's work.

Megan Nilsen:

And even now they're 17 and 19.

Megan Nilsen:

And there are still plenty of moments where I see this, interaction, where

Megan Nilsen:

maybe the trust isn't totally there and there's not that vulnerability.

Megan Nilsen:

I listened to a pastor, years ago, and this is kind of what you're

Megan Nilsen:

referring to in the book that said.

Megan Nilsen:

What is the difference between a child of God?

Megan Nilsen:

How do you know when you're kind of acting in that as a child of

Megan Nilsen:

God versus the orphan spirit?

Megan Nilsen:

And he said something very simple, but very profound.

Megan Nilsen:

At least it was to me.

Megan Nilsen:

He said, the orphan has a high.

Megan Nilsen:

Need for control and a low level of trust because you've been burned, so to speak.

Megan Nilsen:

So you don't know who you can trust.

Megan Nilsen:

You need to control everything about your life and that's

Megan Nilsen:

how you'll be okay and fine.

Megan Nilsen:

But the child of God has a high level of trust in the love and the

Megan Nilsen:

resources around them and a low need to control their environment

Megan Nilsen:

and everybody else around them.

Megan Nilsen:

And I think, yes, you can talk about this in the very literal, like.

Megan Nilsen:

Orphan sense, but if you're talking in a spiritual sense, that to me has been

Megan Nilsen:

a huge topic and really a theme that has transformed my spirituality because

Megan Nilsen:

every day I'm thinking, okay, am I acting like, do I have an orphan spirit

Megan Nilsen:

where I'm trying to kind of trying to control my surroundings, control the

Megan Nilsen:

agenda, control the people around me because I don't really trust either

Megan Nilsen:

God's faithfulness, God's provision.

Megan Nilsen:

Or I don't trust the other people to kind of, you know, do

Megan Nilsen:

their part and live their life.

Megan Nilsen:

And if the answer, if I, if I start to get revelation that I'm trying to control and

Megan Nilsen:

I'd have a low level of trust, then I have this moment where I can go, okay, how can

Megan Nilsen:

I trust God more and release the control?

Megan Nilsen:

Because when I try to control things, it gets very, very,

Megan Nilsen:

just tense and exhausting.

Megan Nilsen:

Anxiety producing.

Megan Nilsen:

And if Jesus came to give us peace and abundant life, then at least to

Megan Nilsen:

me, I have this recognition every day.

Megan Nilsen:

Which way am I going to go?

Megan Nilsen:

Am I going to go for a deeper trust in God, releasing the control back to him?

Megan Nilsen:

Or am I going to take it all back once again?

Tim Winders:

interesting about it, and I don't think I want us to go down this

Tim Winders:

rabbit hole, is that I know that you do quite a bit with personality profiles,

Tim Winders:

and again, disc strength finders, Enneagram, all those type things.

Tim Winders:

It is very easy for us to make probably sweeping comments.

Tim Winders:

I do think trust is a foundational issue that you brought up, but we

Tim Winders:

also have this factor of all of us are wired in such different Ways at

Tim Winders:

times, and there are personalities.

Tim Winders:

My wife and I were just discussing this.

Tim Winders:

We've been together 35 years.

Tim Winders:

And yesterday we had a bit of a come to Jesus conversation where we're both

Tim Winders:

working on some new projects, even in our sixties, we're working on some new

Tim Winders:

projects and she was working on it.

Tim Winders:

And I told her this, it didn't go well initially, but she came around later

Tim Winders:

and she spent some time with the Lord this morning and said, by the way,

Tim Winders:

God said you were right, which I just want to mark it down as that was,

Tim Winders:

you know, possibly, possibly a first.

Tim Winders:

Well, what she was doing is she was, she was kind of grinding out

Tim Winders:

this Project instead of enjoying the journey and being joyful along the way.

Tim Winders:

And one of the things we're purposing is to be more joyful with

Tim Winders:

all that we're doing in our lives.

Tim Winders:

So anyway, personalities still factor into it.

Tim Winders:

But I do want to start going into the power of writing stuff down of journaling.

Tim Winders:

And before we get close to that, though, I want to ask one more question before we

Tim Winders:

get to it, because many people will say.

Tim Winders:

I don't have time when I sit down, I've got all these things going through

Tim Winders:

my mind and I'll state it this way.

Tim Winders:

And then I'll just let you kind of talk more about it.

Tim Winders:

But I believe we talk about it quite a bit here on the show

Tim Winders:

that we all are leading and.

Tim Winders:

2024 when we're recording this distracted lives, we've got

Tim Winders:

so many things distracting us.

Tim Winders:

So many things coming at us and we allow that it's still up to us.

Tim Winders:

We can control that.

Tim Winders:

And I think that's what prevents a lot of people from getting started.

Tim Winders:

With this process, any comment on this, on just the

Tim Winders:

distractedness of the way we live?

Megan Nilsen:

Amen.

Megan Nilsen:

It's a real simple comment.

Megan Nilsen:

yeah, we're distracted.

Megan Nilsen:

I think that's a tale as old as time, but with the advancement of technology

Megan Nilsen:

and the 24 seven noise access to information, I feel like right now is

Megan Nilsen:

probably an era in history in which.

Megan Nilsen:

We have to access self control more than ever.

Megan Nilsen:

self control is a fruit of the spirit.

Megan Nilsen:

I am reminded of that all the time.

Megan Nilsen:

And I like to remind people of that because when we have access

Megan Nilsen:

to so much at our fingertips, any distraction, anything that's going

Megan Nilsen:

to entertain us, even educate us, and we can just scroll through Tik TOK.

Megan Nilsen:

and my kids are always saying, but mom, I'm learning things.

Megan Nilsen:

Well, that's great.

Megan Nilsen:

That you're learning things, but it's also like a drug.

Megan Nilsen:

It's kind of this like dopamine hit where it's like a new thing, a new

Megan Nilsen:

thing, a new thing all the time.

Megan Nilsen:

So what happens then is we're out of practice.

Megan Nilsen:

We're out of practice of being quiet and still, and sitting and listening.

Megan Nilsen:

And our kids nowadays don't even really know what it means to be bored.

Megan Nilsen:

Because if they have access to a smartphone, so take what you will

Megan Nilsen:

there, decide when that is appropriate for you and your family, but you

Megan Nilsen:

have access to just something that's going to be like a drug at any time.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't have to think that deeply because I think one of the things

Megan Nilsen:

we're battling against is when I sit down and I really consider my life

Megan Nilsen:

and I start to go, okay, God, Wow.

Megan Nilsen:

This is what I'm feeling.

Megan Nilsen:

This is what I'm experiencing.

Megan Nilsen:

That is not an easy task.

Megan Nilsen:

I mean, that is something that you could, it could almost get harder before it

Megan Nilsen:

gets easier because you're accessing some deep and potentially painful places.

Megan Nilsen:

Why would I want to do that?

Megan Nilsen:

Why wouldn't I want to just like numb my brain and numb my heart?

Megan Nilsen:

I don't have to deal with that.

Megan Nilsen:

So I think what happens in writing and, and, and I'm not even talking

Megan Nilsen:

about typing, I'm So my argument is that people pick up an actual pen.

Megan Nilsen:

and a piece of paper and start writing things down, because there's something

Megan Nilsen:

very, scientific neurological that happens in your brain that begins to

Megan Nilsen:

connect those synapses, your head and your heart that doesn't happen when you're

Megan Nilsen:

kind of distracted in that noisy world.

Megan Nilsen:

so I think it's super, super powerful to pick up a pen and sit down And

Megan Nilsen:

it doesn't even take that long.

Megan Nilsen:

It can take five minutes.

Megan Nilsen:

It doesn't have to take a long time.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause a lot of people say, I don't have time.

Megan Nilsen:

Obviously I don't have time is a fantastic excuse.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause we make time for things that are important to us.

Megan Nilsen:

We know that, right?

Megan Nilsen:

It's like, I don't have time to sit down and watch the entire seasons of Ted Lasso.

Megan Nilsen:

Well, somehow you made the time to do that.

Megan Nilsen:

But, we make time for what we value.

Megan Nilsen:

So then I would put the question back on somebody, then what do you value?

Megan Nilsen:

If you value being a person who is growth minded, growth oriented, you

Megan Nilsen:

want to stay connected to the people in your life and to the God that you

Megan Nilsen:

believe in, then I would argue that it's going to take some time and some

Megan Nilsen:

stillness to get to the place where that's really powerful connection.

Tim Winders:

I think you brought up, you hit multiple nerves that I've had to

Tim Winders:

address over the last handful of years.

Tim Winders:

And I think.

Tim Winders:

In those comments, you just made the first one for me.

Tim Winders:

And when I work with leaders and leadership organizations,

Tim Winders:

this is one of the things I am promoting as much as anything.

Tim Winders:

And that is just the need to be still and quiet, whatever that means.

Tim Winders:

That's different for different people.

Tim Winders:

The second piece of it, and I don't know that I saw it.

Tim Winders:

In reading the book, maybe I missed it.

Tim Winders:

And I do love that you are a pen and paper, pencil, paper, whatever, because

Tim Winders:

I've tried to do some digital things.

Tim Winders:

I've tried to be cleaner, efficient, et cetera.

Tim Winders:

And I just don't, and also have bad penmanship, my penmanship.

Tim Winders:

It makes it, I write in tongues.

Tim Winders:

And so I do need interpretation typically when I do that.

Tim Winders:

And so it makes it tough.

Tim Winders:

One thing I've noticed about myself, I used to think I was a multitasker.

Tim Winders:

I cannot multitask when I'm writing, especially pen to paper.

Tim Winders:

And I think when we're talking about honest conversations, especially

Tim Winders:

with our creator, it's important for us to be as focused as possible.

Tim Winders:

And so somewhere along the way, you came up with this

Tim Winders:

beautiful exchange journaling, and that is built and developed.

Tim Winders:

Tell a little bit more about the origin of that and kind of how that has continued

Tim Winders:

to grow and

Megan Nilsen:

that?

Megan Nilsen:

What does that mean?

Megan Nilsen:

What is this thing?

Megan Nilsen:

before I talk about beautiful exchange journaling, I had this moment because

Megan Nilsen:

your podcast is seek, go create, correct?

Megan Nilsen:

So I feel like when you have a pen and a piece of paper,

Megan Nilsen:

you're in the seeking posture.

Megan Nilsen:

And then when you flip over to create, Open up your computer and start writing

Megan Nilsen:

like that to me, if I'm seeking, I've got a pen and a piece of paper and

Megan Nilsen:

I'm doing some really deep inner work and really sussing out untangling

Megan Nilsen:

some of the things that are going on.

Megan Nilsen:

And then when God begins to give revelation and ideas.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm going to open up my computer and I'm going to start to create.

Megan Nilsen:

I felt like a really interesting connection for me, but

Megan Nilsen:

beautiful exchange journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

Okay.

Megan Nilsen:

This is, there's two parts to the origin here.

Megan Nilsen:

Number one is when I was writing my first book called the beautiful exchange.

Megan Nilsen:

I couldn't not write it.

Megan Nilsen:

This was one of those things where I was going through the spiritual

Megan Nilsen:

transformation myself and the adoption narrative is kind of the through

Megan Nilsen:

line of this book, but ultimately the phrase of beautiful exchange.

Megan Nilsen:

Is what I felt like God was giving to me.

Megan Nilsen:

His, the tagline is responding to God's invitation for more.

Megan Nilsen:

So I was in this moment, like I've kind of described where he's saying,

Megan Nilsen:

you're holding onto things so tightly.

Megan Nilsen:

You think they're going to bring you fulfillment.

Megan Nilsen:

You think they're going to bring you success or purpose, but what I'm offering

Megan Nilsen:

you, Megan, and I would suggest that he might be saying this to some of your

Megan Nilsen:

listeners too, is if you will release that to me, if you will open up your hands and

Megan Nilsen:

your heart Give me the things that you're trying to take so much control over.

Megan Nilsen:

I will actually exchange those things for my spirit, my ways, my plans for you.

Megan Nilsen:

So to me, a beautiful exchange is what God is offering us that is far

Megan Nilsen:

beyond what we could ask or imagine.

Megan Nilsen:

He says this in scripture and he wants to exchange the things that we ask.

Megan Nilsen:

Are limited thinking for his abundance.

Megan Nilsen:

So that's the idea of the beautiful exchange.

Megan Nilsen:

So then as I'm growing over these past years in my own spiritual formation,

Megan Nilsen:

I'm starting to hear this pastor start talking about two way journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

And he's saying, listen, you can write out your thoughts to God.

Megan Nilsen:

Ask him a question, pour out your ideas and your thinking to him.

Megan Nilsen:

And then you stop and you listen and you kind of tune to the Holy

Megan Nilsen:

Spirit and you say, okay, God, what's your perspective here?

Megan Nilsen:

What is your kingdom, wisdom, and grace?

Megan Nilsen:

And, just counsel over what I'm experiencing.

Megan Nilsen:

And it's this idea of, Oh, it's going two ways now.

Megan Nilsen:

It's not just me talking to God, talk, talk, talk, and then shut the door.

Megan Nilsen:

It's okay.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm going to pour out my heart.

Megan Nilsen:

I am his child.

Megan Nilsen:

he is a heavenly father.

Megan Nilsen:

He's a good father who wants to listen to me and he offers good things to his kids.

Megan Nilsen:

And then.

Megan Nilsen:

In humility and vulnerability, I sit and listen and that's the two way part.

Megan Nilsen:

Now what am I experiencing?

Megan Nilsen:

what impressions are coming to my mind from the Holy Spirit that I can

Megan Nilsen:

begin to write down that is activating truth in my life, that is activating

Megan Nilsen:

guidance and counsel and a way forward.

Megan Nilsen:

And so that's this idea of two way journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

I kind of overlaid the beautiful exchange.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause to me, they felt very much related.

Megan Nilsen:

Like I'm releasing the things of anxiety that my flesh is holding on to.

Megan Nilsen:

And I'm exchanging that as I'm listening for your spirit.

Megan Nilsen:

And then the last thing I'll say about this, which is the journal that

Megan Nilsen:

I just published last year is that I woke up one morning and I don't know

Megan Nilsen:

how you are as, as a creative, but a lot of times for me, I will just

Megan Nilsen:

ideas will come out of quote nowhere.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm a believer.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm going to say it's coming from God.

Megan Nilsen:

So I wake up one morning a couple of years ago and I have been

Megan Nilsen:

practicing this two way journaling and I just felt like the whole rest

Megan Nilsen:

of this blueprint for journaling was like downloaded into my head.

Megan Nilsen:

And so I thought, okay, if I write.

Megan Nilsen:

And then I listen, the strategist in me, we've discussed the strategy

Megan Nilsen:

piece of the CliftonStrengths.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm like, okay, what do I do with this now?

Megan Nilsen:

What are people supposed to do with the kingdom wisdom that they receive?

Megan Nilsen:

And so that's the rest of the journaling practice is now that you've.

Megan Nilsen:

Received from the Lord.

Megan Nilsen:

What is the truth that he wants to give you?

Megan Nilsen:

What is the counseling wants to give you moving forward?

Megan Nilsen:

And I felt very passionate about activating people into taking

Megan Nilsen:

bold steps of faith towards what he's inviting you to do.

Tim Winders:

it does.

Tim Winders:

And the reason that is, it's so cool to me as I was reading it, I was realizing that.

Tim Winders:

I've been doing sort of that for some time.

Tim Winders:

If one looks at my journal, it kind of goes like this.

Tim Winders:

There's me sometimes dumping, sometimes showing gratitude, sometimes just, I

Tim Winders:

don't want to say diarying, but you know, maybe like being sort of diary type stuff.

Tim Winders:

Just Talking, kind of getting some stuff out of my head.

Tim Winders:

There's two squiggly lines on the page.

Tim Winders:

And beneath the squiggly lines, it's in my view, it's God responding to me and

Tim Winders:

with instruction and things like that.

Tim Winders:

I guess it kind of was some good confirmation for me.

Tim Winders:

It's like, Oh, maybe I'm doing some cool stuff and doing something right here.

Tim Winders:

But one of the things Megan, I'd like to maybe address, because you mentioned

Tim Winders:

it in the book, that journaling is a trigger word for some people.

Tim Winders:

Good or bad.

Tim Winders:

I mean, there's some people that boy, they love to talk about their journaling.

Tim Winders:

I think some people talk about journaling more than they actually do it.

Tim Winders:

We won't get into that here.

Tim Winders:

and then some people do it, do it, do it, and it's become habit.

Tim Winders:

But maybe, like you said, there isn't the reflective, you know,

Tim Winders:

transformation that should come from it.

Tim Winders:

Talk about why it's a trigger and the challenge that some people have.

Tim Winders:

and then we're going to talk as we finish up with some technique and some things

Megan Nilsen:

Yeah, it is a trigger.

Megan Nilsen:

In fact, I have a chapter in the book that you're referring to.

Megan Nilsen:

It's something about like, tackling journal phobia or something

Megan Nilsen:

because, honestly, it is a trigger addressing journal phobia.

Megan Nilsen:

That's the chapter.

Megan Nilsen:

And I'm laughing because, this is my husband, he's like, I don't journal.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't really write.

Megan Nilsen:

and he heard me one time I was hosting a Christmas event for some women and I

Megan Nilsen:

was leading them through this type of journaling around the Advent season.

Megan Nilsen:

And he was, my darling husband was helping like serve coffee and helping me with

Megan Nilsen:

all the logistics and things like that.

Megan Nilsen:

So he was overhearing.

Megan Nilsen:

As I guided women through this journaling practice.

Megan Nilsen:

And as we were leaving the venue and we're all packed up, he

Megan Nilsen:

said, wow, that's really cool.

Megan Nilsen:

When you asked me if I would journal, he's like, I don't really want to write stuff

Megan Nilsen:

down, but now that I've seen you guide someone through it, Well, I could do that.

Megan Nilsen:

So I think one of the triggers and maybe barriers to journaling

Megan Nilsen:

this, this word is that people are like, I'm not really a writer.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't really know what to write.

Megan Nilsen:

You're staring at a blank page.

Megan Nilsen:

There's nothing on the page and all of a sudden your mind is jammed

Megan Nilsen:

up with all kinds of thoughts.

Megan Nilsen:

And so what I think, why I find this guided journaling helpful

Megan Nilsen:

or even prompts is that it just, it has a way of settling down.

Megan Nilsen:

the rate of our thoughts, and I actually offered in episode 50 of my podcast,

Megan Nilsen:

the kingdom life coaching podcast, actually recorded myself guiding

Megan Nilsen:

someone through this journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

Because when you have someone just leading you by the hand, it's not

Megan Nilsen:

even like I'm telling you where to go.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm just giving you the next step and the next step.

Megan Nilsen:

There's something that might settle your spirit.

Megan Nilsen:

Like, Oh, and now she's asking me to think about this and write about this.

Megan Nilsen:

And it's not this overwhelming blank page.

Megan Nilsen:

That's like, I don't even know what to write.

Megan Nilsen:

I have so many things going on.

Megan Nilsen:

I can't access those thoughts.

Megan Nilsen:

So boom, I'm just going to walk away.

Megan Nilsen:

So it can be overwhelming and you're right.

Megan Nilsen:

it's polarizing.

Megan Nilsen:

Some people are like, Oh my gosh, I love journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

I've journaling since I was a little kid.

Megan Nilsen:

This is the best thing I can ever think to do.

Megan Nilsen:

And some people are like, absolutely not.

Megan Nilsen:

And if you're an absolutely not, I would just encourage you.

Megan Nilsen:

Maybe to give it a try.

Megan Nilsen:

It's like, you know, things that are good for you, we're supposed

Megan Nilsen:

to try these things in life.

Megan Nilsen:

And if it really doesn't work for you, that's okay.

Megan Nilsen:

The only thing I would say as an encouragement for someone in that

Megan Nilsen:

space is if journaling, if writing things down with God is kind of not

Megan Nilsen:

your jam, then I would ask you what is.

Megan Nilsen:

Is it going for a walk?

Megan Nilsen:

Is it, listening to music?

Megan Nilsen:

Like, how will you process your thoughts with God and hear from him?

Megan Nilsen:

That's what you have to figure out.

Tim Winders:

I love that you said that because so many people attempt to make

Tim Winders:

everything formulaic or create a doctrine around it or something like that.

Tim Winders:

So let's do this.

Tim Winders:

We've got a few minutes left here.

Tim Winders:

Get someone started.

Tim Winders:

Let's just say someone they've heard the journaling thing.

Tim Winders:

They know they need to do it.

Tim Winders:

You've got some resources for people.

Tim Winders:

We can talk about those here, but just let's kind of get someone

Tim Winders:

started because I do agree.

Tim Winders:

It's something that even hard chargers leader type people, they

Tim Winders:

need to sit down, be still and quiet.

Tim Winders:

And this is a practice that can help them.

Tim Winders:

So, get us started.

Megan Nilsen:

Get us started.

Megan Nilsen:

Well, I think the first step in any new practice or anything that's

Megan Nilsen:

going to challenge us is to really buy into why we're doing this.

Megan Nilsen:

So say you're going to go to the gym and start lifting weights and you're

Megan Nilsen:

like, Oh, I've heard that it's good for me, but I don't really know.

Megan Nilsen:

you have to trust that the experience is going to be good for it's painful,

Megan Nilsen:

whether it's uncomfortable or not.

Megan Nilsen:

That's what I would say about journaling.

Megan Nilsen:

You might have these preconceived notions about like, ugh, I don't really do that.

Megan Nilsen:

So I just want to make the case that it's really good for

Megan Nilsen:

human beings to try new things.

Megan Nilsen:

to get started, all you really need is a notebook and a pen and your own thoughts.

Megan Nilsen:

And so my very foundational question for you would be, is there anything

Megan Nilsen:

in your life right now that is confusing or overwhelming to you?

Megan Nilsen:

If the answer is yes.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm a business owner.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't know what decision to make about my business.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm in a marriage and I don't really know what to do with this relationship.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm parenting my kids and I'm not exactly sure which way to go

Megan Nilsen:

as far as, how to parent them.

Megan Nilsen:

Well, then you are a person who is.

Megan Nilsen:

Well positioned to journal because you have something on your heart that if you

Megan Nilsen:

write it down, if you start to discover what it is, name it and be honest about

Megan Nilsen:

it, you're bringing it to the light.

Megan Nilsen:

I think that's what journaling is.

Megan Nilsen:

It's bringing something to the light that is actually more comfortable

Megan Nilsen:

to keep hidden and locked away.

Megan Nilsen:

And we know that things that are hidden in the dark.

Megan Nilsen:

Begin to grow mold and begin to grow bacteria.

Megan Nilsen:

And there are unhealthy things that happen when, when thoughts

Megan Nilsen:

are left in dark places.

Megan Nilsen:

So you don't necessarily have to announce to the world what you're thinking about.

Megan Nilsen:

This is a place where you just get to go with your own thoughts and with

Megan Nilsen:

the God who loves you and created you and just begin to ask him.

Megan Nilsen:

What do you want to show me about this?

Megan Nilsen:

And then you have to trust that he will speak to you, that

Megan Nilsen:

thoughts will come to your mind.

Megan Nilsen:

And then that's the practice of how do I discern which thoughts are

Megan Nilsen:

his thoughts and my, my thoughts.

Megan Nilsen:

You have to start to read the Bible and understand his voice and be in

Megan Nilsen:

Christian community and a healthy space where you're, I mean this, we could

Megan Nilsen:

talk about this for a whole other hour, but just to get started, trust that you

Megan Nilsen:

have something that's bothering you.

Megan Nilsen:

if you write it down and you name it.

Megan Nilsen:

outright, then God can begin to speak to you about that thing.

Megan Nilsen:

And it's not as overwhelming.

Megan Nilsen:

I hope it's not as overwhelming as it might seem.

Tim Winders:

it's interesting when something's bothering

Tim Winders:

you, you brought that up.

Tim Winders:

I think during COVID, I looked back at my journals during COVID and I was

Tim Winders:

just super confused about, and I think it was a lot of crying out, Lord,

Tim Winders:

what's going on, what's happening?

Tim Winders:

And basically, I think the Lord responded, said, what, why

Tim Winders:

does any of this surprise you?

Tim Winders:

This is the type world we're in.

Tim Winders:

There's just stuff going on.

Tim Winders:

And so I felt, maybe rebuked a little bit on that, but how does someone know?

Tim Winders:

And this is a little bit of a loaded question, but how does

Tim Winders:

someone know measure gauge, whatever, if they're doing it.

Tim Winders:

Well, or if they're progressing or what are some clues along the way

Tim Winders:

that someone could say, you know what, this is actually, this is bringing me

Tim Winders:

closer to, as you said, clarity and peace in the subtitle of your book.

Megan Nilsen:

So the question is, how does anyone know they're doing this?

Megan Nilsen:

Well, the short answer I can, that the most succinct answer

Megan Nilsen:

that I can say is doing it.

Megan Nilsen:

Well, you're doing life well.

Megan Nilsen:

When you can see the fruit, when you can see that, that you are more

Megan Nilsen:

deeply connected to God and other people to yourself and to a fulfilling

Megan Nilsen:

vision and purpose for your life.

Megan Nilsen:

you might be struggling if you don't see the fruit, if it feels like some real

Megan Nilsen:

dead ends and some disconnectedness in your life to your own purpose, to your

Megan Nilsen:

own fulfillment, to the people around you.

Megan Nilsen:

So I don't think it's necessarily rocket science.

Megan Nilsen:

I actually think, you know, Brene Brown is a very, well spoken.

Megan Nilsen:

influencer in this space, but the more vulnerable you can

Megan Nilsen:

be, the more honest you can be.

Megan Nilsen:

and really discarding shame and not withholding yourself cause you're

Megan Nilsen:

embarrassed or you feel shame about it.

Megan Nilsen:

If you can go after some things and just say, you know what?

Megan Nilsen:

and just name it like this is embarrassing to say, and I'm not really sure if I want

Megan Nilsen:

to say this out loud, but I trust that if I do good things are going to happen,

Megan Nilsen:

I'm going to have more self awareness.

Megan Nilsen:

Other people are going to understand me better than I think that is how, you know,

Megan Nilsen:

if you're doing it well in your words.

Tim Winders:

I think one thing that I've noticed,

Tim Winders:

you hear athletes at times talk about being in

Tim Winders:

The zone and sometimes in a sport that's very fast, they'll say

Tim Winders:

that it slows down when they're in

Tim Winders:

that zone.

Tim Winders:

I think to quote Ferris Bueller, that life comes at us pretty fast for me.

Tim Winders:

This practice, and when I do it, well, things tend to slow down and

Tim Winders:

I feel as if I'm just in the zone and I don't even know, you know,

Tim Winders:

defining this being at peace, I think is always tough, but it's like when

Tim Winders:

you're there, you know it, but when you're not, you may not understand it.

Tim Winders:

And I, think that's what it is.

Tim Winders:

for me is just kind of being in the zone and you brought up something.

Tim Winders:

I had this word down that you, in your book, you talked about it, that you can

Tim Winders:

be maybe at times sarcastic and all that.

Tim Winders:

And to me, I noticed when I'm really doing.

Tim Winders:

Journaling and all that.

Tim Winders:

My heart is softer.

Megan Nilsen:

Mm hmm.

Tim Winders:

It's just I have a softer heart and I'm more

Tim Winders:

compassionate and loving to people.

Megan Nilsen:

I love that in the zone.

Megan Nilsen:

I love it because, and if you want to be in the zone, find things, find systems and

Megan Nilsen:

routines and people and places that invite you into, that usher you into the zone.

Megan Nilsen:

So for me, as someone who really processes things verbally out loud,

Megan Nilsen:

the zone can be speaking or journaling because that's how I'm wired and

Megan Nilsen:

you had mentioned that earlier.

Megan Nilsen:

We have different personalities, we have different wiring.

Megan Nilsen:

So find the thing, the systems, the people, the places really guide

Megan Nilsen:

you into your zone and press into that, like stay there, build that.

Megan Nilsen:

That's a good thing to build.

Tim Winders:

Megan, I noticed that most of your resources are geared towards female.

Tim Winders:

Would you say that's your primary audience?

Tim Winders:

I got, I got a lot from the book myself.

Tim Winders:

I mean, I just read the book, but tell, tell us who the book is for.

Tim Winders:

Go ahead and do that.

Tim Winders:

And then go ahead and tell us where to find all your resources.

Megan Nilsen:

Yeah.

Megan Nilsen:

It's funny.

Megan Nilsen:

I don't know why everybody likes to take female teachers and speakers

Megan Nilsen:

and say, you must speak to females.

Megan Nilsen:

Right.

Megan Nilsen:

I know you've talked about this on your podcast before

Megan Nilsen:

and I'm like, no, it's not just

Megan Nilsen:

if you, okay.

Megan Nilsen:

Let me ask you this.

Megan Nilsen:

if God speaks to his people, does he just speak to women?

Megan Nilsen:

Well, don't answer that.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause he might.

Megan Nilsen:

No, I'm just kidding.

Tim Winders:

Be

Tim Winders:

careful.

Tim Winders:

Be Careful.

Tim Winders:

That's a landmine.

Megan Nilsen:

so this book and this journaling is for anyone who's hungry.

Megan Nilsen:

and curious to really be connected to God, to hear what he has to say.

Megan Nilsen:

Someone who really wants to live, by God's grace, by his love and by his guidance.

Megan Nilsen:

and someone who's like, but I'm not sure if I really know how to do that.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm not sure if I know how to hear his voice.

Megan Nilsen:

Does he really speak to me?

Megan Nilsen:

How could I access this thing that you're talking about?

Megan Nilsen:

I feel like this is book is a very foundational book for someone who's kind

Megan Nilsen:

of growing in the things of the spirit, growing in the things of hearing from

Megan Nilsen:

God, or even just beginning because it's going to just give you a lot of

Megan Nilsen:

foundational understanding of who God is, what his voice sounds like, and how you

Megan Nilsen:

can begin to experience this for yourself.

Megan Nilsen:

does that sound pretty good?

Megan Nilsen:

Having read the book yourself?

Tim Winders:

It does.

Tim Winders:

And listen, let's just, I'll, I'll say it a little more bluntly.

Tim Winders:

Everyone needs to position themselves so they can hear God's voice.

Tim Winders:

Period.

Tim Winders:

and we all need to be working on that probably more than we currently do.

Tim Winders:

And any tool or resource that helps, I think

Tim Winders:

has value.

Tim Winders:

And I do, I get a little bit annoyed.

Tim Winders:

Gosh, I don't want to go down here.

Tim Winders:

I do get a little bit annoyed with the male, female, I try to address it some,

Tim Winders:

but I don't know that I do it well.

Tim Winders:

And I sometimes maybe even stir the pot more, but you know, it's Part

Tim Winders:

of our issues that we deal with in our current culture and also,

Megan Nilsen:

the men that latch onto this are just Amazing.

Megan Nilsen:

And there's some guys that are like, Oh my gosh, this is powerful.

Megan Nilsen:

So thanks.

Tim Winders:

Hey, you've also go ahead and mention here.

Tim Winders:

I know I got some of your resources pulled up here on my browser,

Tim Winders:

but mention what all you have.

Tim Winders:

Real quick.

Tim Winders:

Cause I've listened to some of your podcast, you do kingdom coaching.

Tim Winders:

Just go ahead and do a

Tim Winders:

little promo here

Megan Nilsen:

you go to my website, MeganBNilson.

Megan Nilsen:

com, N I L S E N.

Megan Nilsen:

com, you'll kind of find the whole umbrella there.

Megan Nilsen:

I have a podcast called Kingdom Life Coaching Podcast, and it's all about how

Megan Nilsen:

can you anchor yourself in your identity In Christ, get aligned with God's voice

Megan Nilsen:

and then activate it into the things that he wants to activate you into.

Megan Nilsen:

It's all about like quieting the noise of the world and really hearing

Megan Nilsen:

God's voice and moving in that space.

Megan Nilsen:

So that's, that's the first thing.

Megan Nilsen:

The second thing would be the two books, a beautiful exchange and untangled

Megan Nilsen:

faith and the companion journal.

Megan Nilsen:

You can read about them on the website.

Megan Nilsen:

Both are available on Amazon, very easy, you know, buy now, it's like

Megan Nilsen:

one click away and this can be in your mailbox in a couple of days.

Megan Nilsen:

and for anybody that's looking for maybe a small group or a book study

Megan Nilsen:

or a Bible study, I really do believe that untangled faith and the journaling

Megan Nilsen:

lens itself To really good small group work or even a larger group work.

Megan Nilsen:

And I created a 10 week guide.

Megan Nilsen:

If you go to untangledfaithstudy.

Megan Nilsen:

com or you can find it on my website, you can just for pennies on the

Megan Nilsen:

dollar, just grab this curriculum.

Megan Nilsen:

I've broken down the entire book.

Megan Nilsen:

I've paired all my podcast episodes that I talk about each chapter.

Megan Nilsen:

I've given you small group questions, reflection questions.

Megan Nilsen:

And so.

Megan Nilsen:

You don't have to do this by yourself.

Megan Nilsen:

I think that's the other thing is some people are like, Oh my gosh, I read

Megan Nilsen:

this book and I did this all by myself.

Megan Nilsen:

I personally think that life is richer.

Megan Nilsen:

Our revelations are richer and deeper when we get to do this in community.

Megan Nilsen:

That's why you and I have podcasts, right?

Megan Nilsen:

Because we're, we value talking with other people.

Megan Nilsen:

And so this book and journal really lends itself to that.

Megan Nilsen:

So check out the podcast, check out the website, the books.

Megan Nilsen:

two free resources that might be interesting to people.

Megan Nilsen:

Number one, if you go to hearinggodbookmark.

Megan Nilsen:

com, hearinggodbookmark.

Megan Nilsen:

com, I have a quick litmus test of how do I know if it's God's voice or my voice?

Megan Nilsen:

Cause that is the number one question I get asked all the time.

Megan Nilsen:

how am I supposed to know the difference?

Megan Nilsen:

Go to that and there's some questions on there that'll help you.

Megan Nilsen:

And the other one would be, if you go on my website on

Megan Nilsen:

the homepage or godsizedream.

Megan Nilsen:

com, you can, I have five questions that you can ask to figure out

Megan Nilsen:

if you have a God sized dream.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause that's the other piece that I'm so passionate about is that

Megan Nilsen:

God's put some fun things inside of you to go seek, go and create.

Megan Nilsen:

But how do you know what that is?

Megan Nilsen:

How do you know what your message is and what you're

Megan Nilsen:

supposed to go do in the world?

Megan Nilsen:

So I've got some questions that could get the, get the ball

Megan Nilsen:

rolling, for your life there too.

Tim Winders:

Very good.

Tim Winders:

We'll include those links down in the notes.

Tim Winders:

I also appreciate you bringing in the seat, go create there

Tim Winders:

in the, at the end there.

Tim Winders:

So check all that out.

Tim Winders:

Final question.

Tim Winders:

Pick one of those words resonates more with you or whatever.

Tim Winders:

Seek, go, or create, and why?

Megan Nilsen:

And why, I have to go with create.

Megan Nilsen:

I think, anytime I can create something, I am just having so much fun.

Megan Nilsen:

I'm in the zone.

Megan Nilsen:

listen, I'm not a gardener.

Megan Nilsen:

Cause I used to think creating was like, I'm going to go

Megan Nilsen:

garden or I'm going to go cook.

Megan Nilsen:

I mean, I I'm not a painter.

Megan Nilsen:

I lose that pictionary.

Megan Nilsen:

I can't draw a dang thing, but I can.

Megan Nilsen:

Right.

Megan Nilsen:

So if you can find something that ushers you into the zone of creating whatever

Megan Nilsen:

that is for you, I think it's super, super powerful and very energizing.

Megan Nilsen:

So I'm all about just go try something, create it, see how it goes.

Megan Nilsen:

And most likely what you create will bless someone else.

Megan Nilsen:

I do believe that to be true.

Megan Nilsen:

It's not just for you.

Tim Winders:

Beautiful.

Tim Winders:

We are created to create.

Tim Winders:

Thank you for sharing, Megan.

Tim Winders:

I appreciate you being a guest here.

Tim Winders:

I appreciate those of you that have listened in, go check out Megan's

Tim Winders:

resources that she mentioned.

Tim Winders:

I listened to about three episodes on her podcast yesterday.

Tim Winders:

They're a great compliment, I think, to what we're doing here.

Tim Winders:

So jump over there and subscribe, listen in, and again, check

Tim Winders:

out all of our other stuff.

Tim Winders:

We are Seat Go Create.

Tim Winders:

We've got new episodes every Monday.

Tim Winders:

They're on YouTube.

Tim Winders:

They're on all your podcast platforms.

Tim Winders:

Make sure you're subscribing and sharing and all those cool things.

Tim Winders:

until next time.

Tim Winders:

Continue being all that you were created to be.

About the Podcast

Show artwork for Seek Go Create - The Leadership Journey for Christian Entrepreneurs and Faith-Driven Leaders
Seek Go Create - The Leadership Journey for Christian Entrepreneurs and Faith-Driven Leaders

About your host

Profile picture for Tim Winders

Tim Winders

Tim Winders is a faith driven executive coach and author with over 40 years of experience in leadership, business, and ministry. Through his personal journey of redefining success, he has gained valuable insights on how to align beliefs with work and lead with purpose. He is committed to helping others do the same, running a coaching business that helps leaders, leadership teams, business owners, and entrepreneurs to align their beliefs with their work and redefine success.

In addition to his coaching business, Tim is also the host of the SeekGoCreate podcast and author of the book Coach: A Story of Success Redefined, which provides guidance for those looking to redefine success and align their beliefs with their work. With his extensive background, unique perspective and strengths in strategic thinking, relationship building, and problem-solving, Tim is well-suited to help clients navigate through difficult times and achieve their goals.